The charts below show the Medical research funding amount in millions of Dollars in Someland and also shows the death number for this area.

The charts below show the Medical research funding amount in millions of Dollars in Someland and also shows the death number for this area.
The illustration above depicts the data regards to
deaths
that happen and medical
research
funding in Someland 1990 based on the diseases with 2 graphs. Some well-known diseases
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
included in the list,
such
as AIDS, Diarrhea, Malaria, TB, Leprosy, and Tropical Diseases. In the
deaths
data,
Tubercolosis
Correct your spelling
Tuberculosis
became the disease that
causing
Wrong verb form
caused
show examples
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
deaths
in that year, by more than 1.5
million
. If we connect
this
data to the medical
research
funding, the many
deaths
in TB can be caused
due to
very limited medical
research
funds that
goes
Change the verb form
go
show examples
to TB, with less than 50
million
dollar.
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
the opposite, AIDS
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
acquire the most funds to conduct
study
Fix the agreement mistake
studies
show examples
with more than 150
million
dollar
Change to a plural noun
dollars
show examples
have
very
Add an article
a very
show examples
low number of
deaths
with less than 0.5
million
in 1990. The disease that has the lowest number of
deaths
is Leprosy
also
has one of the biggest funds allocated to
research
even more.
Submitted by nadiasyifaa on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words deaths, research, million with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: