the diagrams below give information about the manufacture of frozen fish pies

the diagrams below give information about the manufacture of frozen fish pies
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The given diagrams show the stages that are followed to produce Frozen Fish pie.
Overall
Linking Words
, by and large, there are two main phases: the first is to manufacture the
potatoes
Use synonyms
and the second is to have a package which is frozen (containing vegetables and salmon) and store them before sending them to delivery. First of all, the
potatoes
Use synonyms
are brought up to thirty days and the first step starts by washing them carefully after that the peeling stage is allocated between cleaning and cutting. Obviously, the phase is slicing the
potatoes
Use synonyms
into fingers shape. Noticeably that the following procedure is to boil the
potatoes
Use synonyms
before refrigerating them. The final step here is to store
potatoes
Use synonyms
in packets. The second main phase begins with squeezing lemon over fresh salmons and adding salt
then
Linking Words
cooking them using a steam oven.
It is clear that
Linking Words
skins and bones are moved by some workers.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the production is checked by inspection staff. The following stage is adding prepared peas, sauce and
potatoes
Use synonyms
that have been prepared previously to the production.
Finally
Linking Words
, The manufacturing is finished with wrapping and sending the products to refrigerators and storing them.
Submitted by alasfar.maram on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words potatoes with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "give" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: