Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themseleves on their own. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #parents #children #part #group #activities #time #themseleves

While

some

parents

believe they should support their

children

to join social

activities

, other

parents

argue that they should keep themselves busy on their own.

This

essay will provide these views and the agreement that

parents

should encourage their young generation to take part in social

activities

. Joining organized groups is beneficial for communication skills, which is important for youngsters to understand other

people

and improve their personality. There are many social events that

children

can attend to exchange ideas and experiences with others. Not only these

activities

can help young

people

develop their skills, but

also

children

can gain more experience and confidence in society.

Therefore

this

essay agrees that

parents

should support their

children

and encourage them to participate in social

activities

Although

attending organized

activities

can be beneficial to youngsters, some

children

prefer to be independent and enjoy themselves in their leisure time. There are many kinds of hobbies that are positive for

children

such

as reading, drawing, and even learning to play instruments.

For example

, interest in learning to play the guitar can be individually focused

Change preposition

apply

show examples

oneself, and

children

can learn how to start playing the guitar by watching tutorials on Youtube. It is

also

essential for young

people

to find out their interests during their free time on their own. In conclusion,

this

essay agrees that there is a positive effect for young

people

to attend organized group

activities

with their

parents

' encouragement,

although

it is crucial for them to enjoy their leisure time by themselves.

Submitted by ann.saitharn on Fri Jun 16 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

252 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themseleves on their own. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Many people prefer to watch foreign films rather than locally produced films. Why could this be? Should governments give more financial support to local film industries?

The older generations tend to have very traditional ideas about how people should live, think and behave. However, some people believe that these ideas are not helpful in preparing younger generations for modern life. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

With the latest technological advancements, dating is now possible online. Would you recommend online dating for your single friends? What are the advantages and disadvantages of online dating? Site some examples to support your answer.

You have recently visited a museum. Now write a letter to your friend about the museum you have visited. Write a letter to him/ her. In your letter, write: where you went what you saw there how you felt about it

Research indicates that nowadays some consumers are much less influenced by advertising than in the past. What do you think are the reasons for this?Do you think this is a positive or negative development?