Some people say that industrial growth is necessary to solve poverty but some other people argue that industrial growth is leading to poverty and it should be stopped. Discuss both views and give your own opinions.

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These days, one of the highly controversial issues relates to whether to encourage industrial improvement in order to make everyone wealthy or to stable enhancement to stop the increase of poverty.

However

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, in

this

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essay, I will examine both points of view and give my own opinion on the latter.

To begin

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with, on one side of the argument, some people may believe that the development of the industry is a reason that leads to poorness. First of all, they often think that if the large-scale business increases too fast, the money will reduce its value.

Moreover

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, the more

upgrade

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upgrades

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in manufacturing, the more inflation that residents had to face.

For instance

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, industrial growth led to a disparity between rich and poor;

therefore

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, indigence will be widened.

On the other hand

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, the opposing case may exist, these people who believe it make their own reason. The main reason for their belief is that when the industrial sector improves, it means that more people will have jobs.

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, the more increase in industrial growth, the more factories will be built;

hence

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, more occupation opportunities will exist.

Furthermore

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, if industrial growth is improved, the government can gain more money which can be used for investing in the education sector. Thanks to

this

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, children can be well educated and can be rich in the future. In conclusion, all things considered, both views have their own merits.

Nevertheless

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, from my standpoint, I think that the best course of action is to develop the industry at a reasonable speed in order to make sure that the remaining aspects are developed to help the residents

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apply

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improve their

life

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lives

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and decrease poverty.

Submitted by nlongduy on Sat Jun 17 2023

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task response

Your arguments are not fully developed and lack clarity. Make sure to elaborate on your points and provide clear examples to support your ideas.

coherence cohesion

The essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion. Ensure that these elements are present and provide an overview and a summary of the main points in your essay.

11
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

277 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

industrial growth
poverty
income opportunities
technological advancements
productivity
income inequality
wealthy individuals
corporations
environmental impacts
impoverished communities
sustainable development
inclusive development
alleviation
measures
accompany
concerns

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