Some people think that all teenagers should be required to do unpaid work in their free time to help the local community. They believe this would benefit both the individual teenager and society as a whole. Do you agree or disagree?

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Some individuals believe that community service should become compulsory for all adolescents in their leisure time. I strongly believe
,
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apply
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the
Correct your spelling
that
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voluntary
works
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work
show examples
can be advantageous for personal and professional life for individuals and
also
Linking Words
for
community
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the community
show examples
.
To begin
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with, there are several reasons why I believe that unpaid
work
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can have
a positive impacts
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a positive impact
positive impacts
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on the
teens
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as well as
Linking Words
the whole
society
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.
Regardig
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Regarding
teens
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,
teens
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can learn from working as volunteers many skills namely, communication, problem solving,
making
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and making
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decision
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decisions
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.
This
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is because working as
volunteer
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a volunteer
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can make
teens
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engage with real life and learn from
others
Correct quantifier usage
other
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people.
For instance
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,
teens
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who
work
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unpaid
work
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on
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in
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local
hospital
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hospitals
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can gain
experience
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in
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how to deal and communicate with patients , which
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this
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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can
imporve
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improve
soft skills.
Furthermore
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, working unsalaried can
perpare
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prepare
the
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apply
show examples
teenagers for
better
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a better
the better
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future
career
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careers
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.
This
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is because unpaid
work
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is considered
experience
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and
the
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apply
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most companies
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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require
experience
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from applicants, which means
teens
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who have voluntary
experience
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are more likely to get better job
opportunity
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opportunities
show examples
. In
term
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terms
show examples
of
society
Use synonyms
, voluntary
work
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can contribute to
fights
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fighting
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diseases .
For instance
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, when the Covid-19 pandemic , many hospitals around the world required volunteers in order to raise awareness among the public
how
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on how
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to stay healthy and prevent
spread
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the spread
show examples
Linking Words
Change preposition
of this
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this
Correct determiner usage
these
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viurs
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viruses
.
Moreover
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, voluntary
work
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can help adolescents to exploit their free time
in
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for
show examples
valuable
works
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work
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instead
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of
commite
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commit
commute
crime
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crimes
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or using drugs, which
Linking Words
this
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can assist to reduce
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
violence in
society
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. In conclusion, I totally believe voluntary
work
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sholud
Correct your spelling
should
be obligatory for all adolescents ,
becaue
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because
it
have
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has
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a positive effects
Correct the article-noun agreement
a positive effect
positive effects
show examples
on
teens
Use synonyms
themselves
as well as
Linking Words
society
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by faiz3177 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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