Some evidence seem crime would be rising in most countries. Especially between youth. Youth people are in a critical age. The causes of this appear to be focused on two areas and the number of solutions appear to be effective.
It is often said that
one
of the causes of the crime
it
is Correct pronoun usage
apply
about
resection. If Change preposition
apply
people
can not pay their
daily routine , they will Change preposition
for their
crime
. Fix the agreement mistake
crimes
For example
, a man who does not pay his
girl’s school , Change preposition
for his
he
wants to Correct pronoun usage
apply
robber
money for her tuition. Replace the word
rob
One
the other hand , Correct your spelling
On
crime
also
appears to be rising among young people
. One
of the causes of this
case of crime
it
is about youth Correct pronoun usage
apply
people
are in
a critical age. If Change preposition
at
parents
do not aware them
, they will Change preposition
of them
crime
easily. Fix the agreement mistake
crimes
Forinstance
, young Correct your spelling
For instance
people
in
Change preposition
at
these age
are disobedient and they can do anything they want. And social media can impact Change the determiner
this age
these ages
on
them too.
Change preposition
apply
In
Change preposition
On
one
hand there has some solutions Correct article usage
the one
appear
to be effective. Correct pronoun usage
that appear
One
of this
solutions Correct determiner usage
these
it
is about helping Correct pronoun usage
apply
government
. Government has a huge role in Add an article
the government
people
’s life. Examples can be scen
in if government prepare his country for Correct your spelling
seen
the
better life , Correct article usage
a
crime
will be less. In
addition
another solution Add a comma
,addition
it
is about helping Correct pronoun usage
apply
parents
to
their young Change preposition
with
child
. Because young Fix the agreement mistake
children
people
are in
their critical age and do not know what is good for them very well. In Change preposition
at
this
situation
if Add a comma
,situation
parents
do not have excellent behavior
with them , young Change the spelling
behaviour
people
will have distance with
their Change preposition
from
parents
. So parents
should be close with
their youth. Change preposition
to
For
example
Add a comma
,example
parents
do not punishment
their child for everything.
In conclusion , it seems to me Replace the word
punish
crime
has a lot of causes especially
in young Add the comma(s)
,especially
people
these days. There has some bad happening impact on crime
between people
.Submitted by TUTOO on
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite