Today many children and teenagers are overweight and unhealthy. Give reasons to explain why many young people are obese and give some solutions to fix this problem.

In recent years, the unhealthy behaviour of children and teenagers has achieved a great deal of media attention around the world. Given that
this
issue may have far-reaching effects, both nationally and globally, identifying the reasons behind it is key to finding solutions. There are many reasons why youngsters become overweight and unhealthy today.
First,
since the mobile phone has become indispensable over the past few decades in almost every aspect of life, the young will be more likely to be over-stimulated by it, leading to excessive screen time.
Therefore
, healthy activities,
such
as exercising, are usually neglected, which makes young people more susceptible to obesity .
Second,
if parents don't pay close attention to their heir's diet, they will uncontrollably eat foods that are unhealthy but delicious.
For instance
, cakes and candies, which are children's one of the most favourite foods, are the primary causes of diabetes since they are full of sugar and fat.
Nevertheless
, there
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
a number of actionable solutions to curb the trend. By becoming role models in healthy lifestyles and diets, parents can help enhance their children's health significantly.
For example
, if a father or a mother exercises on a regular basis, his or her child will be inclined to try exercising, leaving their phones behind
as a result
.
In addition
, schools and teachers play a crucial role in teaching and sharing the serious effects of unhealthy lifestyles and diets. In fact, if young people are aware that they are opening themselves up to a whole host of serious health issues that can even lead to death, they
would
Wrong verb form
will
show examples
decide to stop eating junk food. In conclusion,
although
it may appear challenging to change negative behaviours, parents and schools can take steps together to help teenagers improve their lifestyles and diets.
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task response
The essay provides a clear and comprehensive response to the task, addressing both the reasons for young people becoming overweight and unhealthy and suggesting actionable solutions. The ideas are relevant and supported throughout the essay. Make sure to provide more specific examples to enhance the depth of the argument.
coherence cohesion
The essay demonstrates a logical structure with a clear introduction and conclusion. However, there is room for improvement in terms of using more cohesive devices, such as linking words, to strengthen the coherence and flow of the essay. Ensure that the ideas are connected and transition smoothly from one to the next.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Sedentary lifestyle
  • Screen time
  • Balanced diet
  • Nutrients
  • Physical education
  • Parental influence
  • Aggressive marketing
  • Emotional stress
  • Coping mechanism
  • Caloric intake
  • Processed foods
  • Nutrient-dense
  • Health awareness
  • Fast food industry
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