Some people think that competitive sports have a positive effect on the education of teenagers while others argue that the effect is negative. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #sports #effect #education #teenagers

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Nowadays, the participation of

teenagers

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in competitive

sports

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is a topic that sparks intense debate.

While

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some argue that these

sports

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have a negative impact on education, others believe that the effects are overwhelmingly positive. In my view, the advantages of competitive

sports

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outweigh any potential drawbacks. Critics claim that highly competitive

sports

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can have detrimental effects on

teenagers

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. They argue that the pursuit of victory at all costs may compromise their physical well-being, leading to serious injuries.

For instance

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, my own sister broke her leg during a basketball game as she disregarded safety precautions in her fervour to win.

Moreover

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, opponents of competitive

sports

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highlight the psychological toll it can take on young individuals. Adolescents, still developing emotional control, may experience profound despair in the face of defeat, which could potentially lead to depression. I vividly recall considering quitting football after my school team lost in a championship, but with the guidance of my parents, I learned to persevere.

In contrast

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, I firmly support the notion that competitive

sports

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have significant benefits for

teenagers

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. The desire to excel and prove oneself can positively impact their self-esteem. The satisfaction derived from achieving success in a championship or winning a highly anticipated game instils a belief in one's own abilities.

Furthermore

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, participating in competitive

sports

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nurtures valuable cooperative skills, vital in today's interconnected world. In my school years, I honed my ability to collaborate through the creation and discussion of performance strategies with my team.

This

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skill has remained invaluable throughout my life. In conclusion,

although

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competitive

sports

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may carry the risk of physical and mental health issues, their potential positive impact cannot be ignored. By ensuring safety measures are in place, individuals can develop a strong sense of self-worth and enhance their cooperative abilities. It is imperative that we recognize the

overall

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value of competitive

sports

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in the education and personal growth of

teenagers

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Submitted by vlad.chibisov on Sun Jun 18 2023

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coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion which indicates the candidate's position. However, the logical structure between paragraphs could be improved for a smoother flow of ideas.

coherence cohesion

Develop the main points further to ensure that each is presented along with adequate explanation and expansion, which will enhance the cohesion of the essay.

task achievement

The response covers the task sufficiently, providing a discussion of both views and giving the candidate's own opinion. However, aim to develop each point equally for a more balanced argument.

task achievement

Ideas are clear and generally well-developed, but strive to present a more comprehensive analysis of each viewpoint to elevate the level of insight within the essay.

task achievement

Examples used are relevant and add value to the argument, but incorporating a wider range of specific examples will strengthen the essay's persuasiveness.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

314 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

promote a healthier lifestyle
valuable life skills
mental focus
teamwork and communication
time management
stress relief
neglecting academics
intense pressure
physical injuries
mental stress
time commitment
fear of failure
emotional well-being
academic performance
balancing sports and academics

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Some people think that competitive sports have a positive effect on the education of teenagers while others argue that the effect is negative. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

online education is better than physical learning. do you agree?

Art and music classes should not be mandatory at school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: Is freedom of speech necessary in a free society? Give reasons for your answer. Agree or Disagree Write at least 250 words.

Fewer people are reading books these days.Therefore, We should close all libraries and use the funds for something more urgent like healthcare. Do you agree or disagree?

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?