Crime rates will fall as advances in technology make it easier to detect and prevent crimes. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#crime #rates #fall #advances #technology #crimes

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It is undeniable in

this

modern era,

technology

improves time by time. I agree with the statement that some advantages can make some advancements including security that can detect and prevent crimes. The following paragraph will explore and provide examples. On the

hand

Correct word choice

other hand

show examples

technology

can be an easy way to improve security.

For example

, some houses put cameras as an “eye” that has abilities to watch, to record cord every activity and movement.

In addition

, it is

Rephrase

apply

show examples

useful for the officer especially the police,

such

as various cases that can be solved by looking at

this

recording.

Besides

that,

technology

can protect us from bad people when they want to

Verb problem

have

show examples

negative desires.

For instance

, lots of companies in the automotive sector give an alarm if someone who is not its owner tries to steal the car by making a

huge

Correct word choice

loud

show examples

sound and sending a notification to the owner's smartphone.

As a result

, the number of cases of crime will go down.

On the other hand

, the

technology

’s improvement can

also

be a problem because ,in recent years, offenders

try

Wrong verb form

have tried

show examples

to use it to get advantages. As an illustration, In Indonesia, there are so many scamming cases by taking people’s money in their bank account through an application or

massage

Correct your spelling

message

show examples

that has been sent to the victims’ phones. But in fact,

this

can be tackled with security awareness or even not clicking every link in a

massage

Correct your spelling

message

show examples

Last

but not least, do not share and keep our private username, password or even general information to everyone. In conclusion, I believe that the improvement of

technology

has more advantages than

its

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

drawbacks because it can be used as a tool to protect or prevent us from crimes.

Submitted by donihabiburrahman8 on Mon Jun 19 2023

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and supporting details to maintain logical structure.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are present, but they could be strengthened to better frame the essay.

task achievement

Provide more in-depth analysis and development of ideas to fully address the task prompt.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

287 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

crime deterrent
high-tech surveillance
facial recognition systems
omnipresence
deter
digital forensics
ballistic testing
revolutionize
exonerate
root causes
social inequality
invasion of privacy
civil liberties
surveillance
data collection
negative implications
cybercrime
hacking
identity theft
online fraud
cybersecurity
vulnerabilities
exploit

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Crime rates will fall as advances in technology make it easier to detect and prevent crimes. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Nowadays, teamwork is in fashion in the workplace and many people working with a group of people. What are the advantages and disadvantages teamwork brings to people who prefer to do so?

Some teachers say students should be organized into group study. Others argue that students should be made to study alone. Discuss the benefits of both and state the more effective method in your opinion.

Living in a country where you have to speak in a foreign language can cause serious social problems as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Do you have difficulty writing a to what extent do you agree or disagree essay?