What do you think is the best way to bring Uzbekistan's education to the top by gaining more knowledge and education or through more practical skills? Explain your choice,using specific reasons and details.

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the graph shows the number of visitors in various
age
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group who was
in
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at
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music
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a music
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festival from 2010
till
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to
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2015
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the 2015
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year period. it is noticeable that a lot of
people
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in
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of
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different
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age
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ages
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attended music
concert
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concerts
show examples
.
proportion
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the proportion
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of teenagers was more
that
Correct word choice
than
show examples
other
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another
show examples
Use synonyms
age
Fix the agreement mistake
ages
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.
in
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In
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term
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terms
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of the number
adults
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of adults
show examples
was
more
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apply
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lower than who was in
the
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apply
show examples
middle
age
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.
overal
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Overall
we can see that in
2010
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the 2010
show examples
year
people
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who
was
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were
show examples
around 45-54 years old attended
conserts
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concerts
.
By contrast
Linking Words
,
elderly
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the elderly
show examples
people
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around 75+ was lower in 2010 ,
however
Linking Words
in the beginning
2013
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of 2013
show examples
the
persantage
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percentage
growed
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grew
show examples
to 20 . Adults who
was
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were
show examples
25-44 years old in 2013 period dramatically higher. Looking at participation numbers, a large quantity of
teenager
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teenagers
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attended
festival
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the festival
show examples
. it's clear that
adults
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the adults
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attending
persentage
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percentage
was
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were
show examples
in the middle. Significantly elderly
people
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's number was lower than
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
.
Submitted by bekzodeshonjonovv on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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