IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

Some people think that one of the best ways to solve environment problems is to increase the cost of fuel for cars and vehicles. Do you agree or disagree.

#people #environment #cost #fuel #cars #vehicles
Environment is the basic necessity for humans to live in
this
 world. Few mankind realize that one of
better
Correct article usage
the better
show examples
way
Fix the agreement mistake
ways
show examples
 to resolve environmental
issues
 by
rise
Correct your spelling
raise
show examples
 the
cost
 of
fuel
 for
cars
,
vehicles
Correct word choice
and vehicles
show examples
.
By
Wrong verb form
Increasing
show examples
increase
 the
cost
 of
fuel
 for
cars
 and
vehicles
 it’s not
better
Add an article
a better
show examples
 way to deal with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
environmental
issues
,
cost
Correct article usage
the cost
show examples
 of
fuel
 rises will affect
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
mankind in different ways.
Fuel
 is the basic necessity to run automobiles, as
cost
Correct article usage
the cost
show examples
 rises of
fuel
 it
effects
 directly basic needs like food,
transportation
Correct word choice
and transportation
show examples
. Environmental
issues
 cannot be resolved by increasing
price
Correct article usage
the price
show examples
 of
fuel
 for automobiles as I disagree with
this
 statement, in my point of view
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
use electric
cars
 as
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 take less amount of
fuel
for running
Change preposition
to run
show examples
 process as these electric
cars
 once charged
so
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
runs
Correct subject-verb agreement
run
show examples
 many kilometers easily without again consumption of
fuel
 requires. The
disadvantages
Fix the agreement mistake
disadvantage
show examples
 of increasing
fuel
cost
Fix the agreement mistake
costs
show examples
 to save
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
, as inflation increases because everything
transports
Wrong verb form
is transported
show examples
 to shops and superstores from
warehouse
Add an article
the warehouse
show examples
 so
cost
Add an article
the cost
show examples
 of products will
increase
. Another disadvantage,
people
Add a missing verb
is people
show examples
 travel
through
Change preposition
in
show examples
 different automobiles to offices as
increase
Add an article
the increase
an increase
show examples
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
fuel
cost
 will
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
 the income of employees it
get
Change the verb form
gets
show examples
 tough for them to bare
expenses
Correct article usage
the expenses
show examples
 of their daily life.
However
,
in other
words
Add a comma
words,
show examples
 reasons for not increasing
cost
Correct article usage
the cost
show examples
 of
fuel
firstly
 as it
effects
Replace the word
affects
show examples
 the economy of
country
Add an article
the country
a country
show examples
 as inflation arises people spend less amount to buy products for their daily usage like
grocery
Fix the agreement mistake
groceries
show examples
 and other basic needs.
Secondly
, it
effects
Replace the word
affects
show examples
 the tourism of
country
Correct article usage
the country
show examples
Change preposition
with as
show examples
as
Correct your spelling
a
show examples
 higher
cost
 of
fuel
 so
tourists
 will
didn’t
Verb problem
not
show examples
 come to visit the
country
so
Correct word choice
and
show examples
 no revenue
generated
Add a missing verb
is generated
show examples
 through
tourism
Add an article
the tourism
show examples
 sector.
For instance
, I share the example regarding
country
 Srilanka is famous for
exotic
Correct pronoun usage
its exotic
show examples
 beach resorts and diverse landscapes. They
increases
Change the verb form
increase
show examples
cost
Add an article
the cost
show examples
 of
fuel
 to save environmental
issues
as
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
not their tourism dept. work in
effective
Change the article
an effective
show examples
 manner
as a result
tourists
Change noun form
tourists'
tourist's
show examples
visit
Correct subject-verb agreement
visits
show examples
 to
country
Correct article usage
the country
show examples
declines
Correct subject-verb agreement
decline
show examples
 as it
effects
Verb problem
apply
show examples
directly economy of
country
Add an article
the country
a country
show examples
.
To conclude
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
,
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
 not
better
Correct article usage
a better
show examples
 way to
increase
 the
cost
 of
fuel
 to save environmental
issues
 as it
effects
Verb problem
apply
show examples
directly the economy
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
in my point of view
use
Wrong verb form
using
show examples
 electric
vehicles
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
helps in limited use of
fuel
instead
 of
fuel
 consumption
vehicles
requires
Correct subject-verb agreement
require
show examples
 more
fuel
 for transportation.
Tourists
 visit to that
country
 where
cost
Add an article
the cost
show examples
 of
fuel
 increases
as
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
effects
Replace the word
affects
show examples
 the pocket of
tourists
 as they have to spend more
due to
 inflation arises in the
country
.
Submitted by bilaltip2000 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • carbon emissions
  • public transport
  • fuel-efficient
  • electric vehicles
  • renewable energy
  • green technologies
  • disproportionately affect
  • commuting
  • infrastructure development
  • cycling and walking
  • deforestation
  • industrial pollution
What to do next:
Look at other essays: