Some people think that having a set retirement age (e.g. 65 years) for everybody, regardless of occupation, is unfair. They believe that certain workers deserve to retire and receive a pension at an earlier age. Do you agree or disagree? Which types of workers do you think should benefit from early retirement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Every now and

then

Linking Words

, work positions differ from person to person. In

this

Linking Words

regard, arguments about having the same set retirement

age

Use synonyms

have always been an issue. Some people believe that it is unfair and that some workers deserve to retire earlier and receive a pension. After all, some jobs are too risky others are exhausting.

First,

Linking Words

working until the

age

Use synonyms

of 65 years consumes a lot of their energy and health. Those kinds of jobs require young and healthy people.

For example

Linking Words

, Builders who risk their life being on the edge of the building breathing toxic building products

as well as

Linking Words

electricians.

Second,

Linking Words

some other jobs are stressful,

such

Linking Words

as teaching, especially at primary schools. Those who work in the educational sector must be patient and outgoing

as well as

Linking Words

, conscious.

However

Linking Words

, as a teacher, I can feel the responsibility that

this

Linking Words

job demands. I argue that teachers are the first to deserve to retire at an early

age

Use synonyms

for many reasons. The most important reason is the generation gap. teachers should be aware of the updates of every generation.

For example

Linking Words

, if you take a 60 old lady and you put her in a primary school with 6 years old students. Does

this

Linking Words

sound normal? Of course not. The gap between teachers and students should be 20 years old at max.

To conclude

Linking Words

, as far as I am concerned, I believe the government should study

this

Linking Words

issue seriously and put an

age

Use synonyms

of retirement

according to

Linking Words

each occupation.

faten92.fd

Jun 20, 2023

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

250 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

age
retirement
unfair
fair
work
jobs
workers
early
pension
health
years
hard
physical
dangerous
long
service
policy
system
flexible
choice
money
cost
balance
risk
check
shift
heavy

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