Many parents choose to teach their children at home rather than sending their children to school. Do you think the benefits of home-schooling outweigh its drawbacks?

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Many parents select to educate their offspring at home

instead

Linking Words

school

Use synonyms

. In my opinion, the demerits of home-schooling outweigh the merits. On the one hand, there are some benefits of home-schooling.

Firstly

Linking Words

, home-schooling

provide

Correct subject-verb agreement

provides

show examples

better

Add an article

a better

show examples

environment for

children

Use synonyms

than

attend

Wrong verb form

attending

show examples

school

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

is because

home schooling

Correct your spelling

homeschooling

show examples

can

elimniate

Correct your spelling

eliminate

bullying

form

Correct your spelling

from

show examples

peer

Fix the agreement mistake

peers

show examples

or teachers, which

Linking Words

this

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

can

leads

Wrong verb form

lead

show examples

increase

Correct article usage

an increase

show examples

the

Change preposition

in the

show examples

performance of

children

Use synonyms

in their

study

Fix the agreement mistake

studies

show examples

Secondly

Linking Words

, parents can save a considerable amount of money , because they do not need to pay fees for

school

Use synonyms

, which

Linking Words

this

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

can reduce

financial

Correct article usage

the financial

show examples

burden

Change preposition

show examples

the parents.

Although

Linking Words

downsides

Correct article usage

the downsides

show examples

mentioned above, I would like to argue that the benefits of home-schooling

significantly

Add a missing verb

are significantly

show examples

more than

drawbacks

Correct article usage

the drawbacks

show examples

. The first advantage,

Use synonyms

school

Fix the agreement mistake

schools

show examples

have teachers

are

Correct pronoun usage

who are

show examples

qualified to educate

children

Use synonyms

and provide proper knowledge. To illustrate,

school

Use synonyms

have specialists in different fields namely, Maths, Physics,and technology ,which

Linking Words

this

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

boosts the quality of education and make sure the

children

Use synonyms

understand better than home-schooling. The second advantage,

Use synonyms

school

Add an article

the school

a school

show examples

can have a

postive

Correct your spelling

positive

impact on

children

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

is because in

school

Use synonyms

children

Use synonyms

can have

opportunity

Correct article usage

the opportunity

show examples

to interact with teachers and

peer

Fix the agreement mistake

peers

show examples

than

home schooling

Correct your spelling

homeschooling

show examples

, which

Linking Words

this

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

can help

children

Use synonyms

become more

socially

Change the word

social

show examples

Furthermore

Linking Words

children

Use synonyms

can

also

Linking Words

learn valuable skills in

school

Use synonyms

For example

Linking Words

Use synonyms

school

Fix the agreement mistake

schools

show examples

usually organize sports activities

such

Linking Words

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

football,

tennis

Correct word choice

and tennis

show examples

, which these sports can teach

children

Use synonyms

cooperation and

competitive

Replace the word

competition

show examples

Linking Words

this

Correct determiner usage

these

show examples

skills can help

childern

Correct your spelling

children

in their personal and professional life. In conclusion, In my perspective, the advantages of homeschooling outweigh the disadvantages, because in

school

Use synonyms

there are qualified educators, and

Use synonyms

school

Fix the agreement mistake

schools

show examples

teach

children

Use synonyms

useful skills

can

Correct pronoun usage

that can

show examples

help them in their personal and professional life.

faiz3177Tue Jun 20 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
36
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

269 words

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Many parents choose to teach their children at home rather than sending their children to school. Do you think the benefits of home-schooling outweigh its drawbacks?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Computer and technology are increasingly being used for online education. Can artificial intelligence enhance the learning experience? Is this a positive or negative development?

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Memorization of information by frequent repetition, namely rote learning, plays a role in many education systems. To what extent do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Smoking not only harms the smoker, but also people nearby. Therefore, smoking should be banned in public places. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

A large number of people are being killed in road accidents every year. Why do so many accidents occur? Make recommendations that would help to reduce the number of road accidents.