For some people shopping is not just about buying what is necessary, but a form of entertainment. Do you think it is a positive or a negative development? Give your opinion and examples from your experience

People have different views about shopping, whether it can be used to purchase basic
things
or it could be for entertainment purposes.
Although
, it has many benefits if you do have an idea of how to use it. But, I believe it has some disadvantages too.
To begin
with, we can see a lot of advantages to
of purchase
Wrong verb form
purchasing
show examples
something, Especially when we buy basic
things
for our daily use to make our life more convenient.
Moreover
, technology has increased their level
according to
their people's
need
Fix the agreement mistake
needs
show examples
so when somebody
sees
Correct subject-verb agreement
see
show examples
things
such
as washing
machine
Fix the agreement mistake
machines
show examples
,
toaster
Fix the agreement mistake
toasters
show examples
and other non-basic
things
, they are more attracted towards
there
Correct your spelling
them
show examples
for their comfort.
Additionally
, buying necessary
things
does not give you only comfort, but it makes you alive.
For example
, rice, wheat, meat and vegetables, these
things
are important for your survival so you go shopping and purchase these useful commodities.
on the other hand
, there are some disadvantages too when we buy
things
more than we want. Because it makes you more dependent than ever, the work you can do manually like harvesting, could not be possible to do when you have an alternative for that,
then
you buy unnecessary machines from the market.
In other words
, it creates a negative impact on your health when you go away from manual work.
In addition
, it can
also
create a significant impact on your financial conditions if you
spent
Wrong verb form
spend
show examples
time on purchasing. In conclusion. where shopping could create a big impact, and it gives you significant benefits if you use it smartly and limited.
Submitted by niteshkhan65 on

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task response
The essay addresses the prompt effectively by discussing both the positive and negative aspects of shopping for entertainment. It is important to ensure that examples are relevant and support the main points more directly.
coherence and cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-presented, providing a clear overview of the topic and summarizing the main points. However, ensure that the body paragraphs are well-structured and each idea flows logically to the next.
task response
The essay effectively presents both the advantages and disadvantages of shopping for entertainment.
coherence and cohesion
The introduction and conclusion provide a strong framework for the essay.

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