the table below shows the result of a survey that asked 60800 scottish (aged 16 years and over )whether they had taen part in different cultural activities in the past 12 months

#survey #scottish #years #taen #part #activities #months

The given table illustrates the data from an observation interview form 6800 Scottish adults divided into 4 groups (aged 16

years

and over) who participated in six kinds of cultural activities (undertaking any crafts, culture purchases, visual arts, and writing, computer-based and any performance) in the

last

year. In general, most of the adults aged 16-25

years

old participated in any performance (dancing, singing, playing a musical instrument and acting)

while

participators aged 45-74

years

old tended to choose to undertake any crafts. Turning into details it is evident that 35 % of people aged 16-24

years

old participated in any performance, and just 10 % chose computer-based.

In addition

, People aged 25-44 were attracted to dancing, singing, playing musical instruments and acting at 22 %.

On the other hand

, a proportion of adults aged 25-44

years

old were interested in undertaking any crafts just 22 %. just about 5 % of people in

this

group chose computer-based and any writing.

Submitted by ieltscuns2022 on Thu Jun 22 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words years with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

▼

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

161 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
Write a letter to your internet service provider to complain. In the letter: – Describe the problem and why you are unhappy – Arrange for an engineer to visit your home – Request a reduction in your bill
I am writing to express my dissatisfaction with your company's service.
6
band
crimes by minors on the rise in recent times. the psychologists claim that the fundamental reason for this is that children these days are lacking the social and emotional learning they need from parents and teachers to what extent do you agree or disagree?
Crimes are increasing day by day. Most of the crimes have been done by teenagers because of the lack of social and emotional guidance from their guardians and teachers. I endorse the statement to a large extent . I have some solid grounds to defend my opinion which I would like to explicate at length in the paragraphs to come.
7
band
1.Many people aspire to balance between work and other parts of their lives, but few achieve it. What are the problems in trying to achieve this and how can these problems be overcome?
It is appropriate that many people are urged to accomplish a work-life balance, but few of them achieve it. While extra working hours at enterprises and the intent of a luxurious life are the causes of this problem, this can be remedied by a couple of measures.
6
band
Some people think universities should provide knowledge and skills related to a future career; others think the true function of university is to give access to knowledge for its own sake. What is your opinion of the main function of university?
Universities are one of the most important institutions in modern society. Post-secondary education provides both general skills and knowledge and sometimes job-specific training. But which of these two should be the main focus? While many people might think the focus should only be the "jobs", I believe universities play a larger social role.
6
band
Some people think it is better for children to grown up in the city, while others think that life in the countryside is more suitable for them. What are the advantages and disadvantages of both places
There has been a remarkable increase in the number of people who advocate that living in an urban area has more advantageous whilst the other side believes that rural places are much fitter for human being's life. In this essay, I will consider the two notions by showing both pros and cons sides giving some convenient examples.

the table below shows the result of a survey that asked 60800 scottish (aged 16 years and over )whether they had taen part in different cultural activities in the past 12 months

Write a letter to your internet service provider to complain. In the letter: – Describe the problem and why you are unhappy – Arrange for an engineer to visit your home – Request a reduction in your bill

crimes by minors on the rise in recent times. the psychologists claim that the fundamental reason for this is that children these days are lacking the social and emotional learning they need from parents and teachers to what extent do you agree or disagree?

1.Many people aspire to balance between work and other parts of their lives, but few achieve it. What are the problems in trying to achieve this and how can these problems be overcome?

Some people think universities should provide knowledge and skills related to a future career; others think the true function of university is to give access to knowledge for its own sake. What is your opinion of the main function of university?

Some people think it is better for children to grown up in the city, while others think that life in the countryside is more suitable for them. What are the advantages and disadvantages of both places