People are now living much longer lives than before and many feel we should remain in the workforce for longer. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The world which we are living in is very developing much faster and
people
want to care for their health more than in the past
for
this
reason nowadays
people
are able to live more sufficiently and longer than our ancestors. Some
people
think we had better keep the workforce for longer to keep
this
position. In my opinion, it is definitely the right choice. On the
one
hand, if our health is not very well in whole our
life
whatever we will achieve does not feel real value.
For example
, at school we have to spend lots of time to be aware of some useful knowledge
then
we finish it and after passing the exam at university we have to learn new unknown subjects and others but after graduating we think to be millionaires or to be successful
people
we must
work
24/7 but not it is not proven opinion because I know
people
who
work
24/7 since their childhood
however
still they do not have even their own car. Achieving our goals is not hard like I wrote just we need a clear aim and we must
work
on only
one
goal to enquire about it. Human,
on the other hand
, is limited to
work
or whatever they start to do in
life
because we are not a machine or not a robot so we need other help to live longer or achieve our big purposes. Let me take
one
example in my
life
, a few years ago I went to Turkey to earn, of course, not travelling and I did not aware of their language or place where I am able to make money with it but
one
friend of mine helped me to fine job and he was with me until I get
this
language. If he did not help me to achieve everything that I have now I would have to
work
so hard even without sleeping tonight. Whether we want or not others' help or the workforce is significant in
this
world. In sum ,
although
we believe we are able to get goals without other's help we always face difficulties which we cannot solve ourselves. So in our
life
, we should take some workforce to keep our
life
balance and to achieve goals early
Submitted by Mr. Big on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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