IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people think certain prisoner should be made to do unpaid community work instead of being put behind the bars. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

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It is often argued that some humankind
thinks
Correct subject-verb agreement
think
show examples
 that not all criminals should be sentenced to jail, but they should do some work for free in place of being put in prison. In
this
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 essay, we discuss
this
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 view, and I totally agree with it, because it will help both the prisoner and the community. At the outset, when some people have committed crimes, all of them should not be in jail, because the degree of crimes are different, which are classified into light and serious as per the law.
Firstly
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, if somebody does light or lower offences, he must be asked to do unpaid service.
For example
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, when an individual quarrels with another one
due to
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 the effect of the peer or if a person speaks with another human using offensive words that harm another person.
As a result
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 of
this
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, the government classifies these actions as a little crime,
hence
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; they have to take part in the community by doing some things without taking money.
Thus
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, they will have a good opportunity to show their society that they have changed. We have to encourage
this
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 idea to be applied because of the huge benefits that will be gained by the individuals and the country. First of all, when the individual starts his work, he must be under supervision and monitoring, and a report must be written about his behaviour monthly to be sent to the government,
therefore
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; all of these conditions will enhance him to be better.
In addition
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 to that the government can ask the prisoners to do the infrastructures of the cities.
For instance
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, they can build railways and roads.
Consequently
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, the authority can save a lot of money, which can be used for other purposes. In conclusion, even though jail sentences must be performed for some folk who committed serious crimes, I strongly recommend that others should do unpaid work, as; a great benefit will be achieved for the individuals and the community.

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task response
Task Response: The essay addresses the prompt and presents a clear argument supporting the idea of assigning unpaid community work to certain criminals instead of imprisonment. However, there is room for improvement in providing a balanced discussion of the opposing viewpoint.
coherence cohesion
Coherence and Cohesion: The essay demonstrates a logical structure and presents clear main points in support of the argument. However, the introduction and conclusion could be more effectively developed to provide a stronger framework for the essay's argument.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Rehabilitation
  • Reintegration
  • Recidivism
  • Reform
  • Restorative justice
  • Incarceration
  • Community service
  • Public safety
  • Skill development
  • Moral obligation
  • Punitive measures
  • Economic efficiency
  • Social consequences
  • Corrective action
  • Non-violent offenders
  • Justice system
  • Public opinion
  • Victim restitution
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