The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugarcane.

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from

sugarcane.
The flow chart illustrates
steps
Correct article usage
the steps
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involved in producing
sugar
out of a plant -
sugar
cane.
Overall
, the whole process contains seven essential stages, starting from
sugar
cane growing on the land to drying and cooling
sugar
crystals in factories. At
first,
it takes a whole year to one and half a year for
sugar
canes
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cane
show examples
to grow before they become mature enough to be harvested. After they are cut down by harvesting machines or human hands, they are collected together and put into a crusher which squeezes the juice out of them. The
sugar
cane juice
then
is put through a limestone filter and gets purified when it is ready for the next step - evaporating. During evaporation, the juice is heated on fire and it is turned into thick syrup inside the evaporator after water is steamed out.
Then
the syrup is sent to a centrifuge which
exrtracts
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extracts
sugar
crystals from it. In the final stage, the crystals are dried and cooled to become
sugar
.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words sugar with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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