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Writing Samples
Band 7

The pie chart show what makes people most happy for two different age groups. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The pie chart show what makes people most happy for two different age groups. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#show #people #two #age #groups #information #features #comparisons
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The
below given
Add a hyphen
below-given
show examples
 charts show two different
age
Use synonyms
 groups of
people
Use synonyms
along with
Linking Words
 the data given in percentage on what exactly makes them jolly and content. The data is divided into five different
factors
Use synonyms
. Looking at the given information, it is easily noticeable that folks are
majorily
Correct your spelling
majority
majorly
 satisfied with achievement at work in both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
age
Use synonyms
 groups.
In addition
Linking Words
, citizens under 30 include categories of having a good appearance and travelling
whereas
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 over 30 include
factos
Correct your spelling
factors
 of Financial Security and Being with Family. As we look briefly at the pie chart of folks under 30, we notice that after achievement at work,
people
Use synonyms
 feel happy by doing various hobbies.
Apart from
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
, Travelling and other
factors
Use synonyms
 play a small role in making citizens feel calm and content. The humans, belonging over the
age
Use synonyms
 of 30 have almost the same percentages of
factors
Use synonyms
to
Change preposition
as
show examples
 that of humans who belong to the
age
Use synonyms
 below 30.
However
Linking Words
, achievement at work and hobbies are followed by Financial Security which is
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
20% and being with family
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 contains 14% of
people
Use synonyms
's satisfaction. Other
factors
Use synonyms
 play a minor role of 10%.
Submitted by rutvipatel199 on

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words age, people, factors with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • illustrates
  • contributing factors
  • distinct age groups
  • primary sources
  • comprising
  • leading contributors
  • predominant
  • accounting for
  • underscores contrasts
  • prioritize
  • universal aspects of well-being
  • engaging in enjoyable activities
  • source of joy
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