IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

1.Some school leavers travel or work for a period of time instead of going directly to university. What are the advantages and disadvantages for their studies?

#school #leavers #travel #work #period #time #university #studies
In the past few days, the topic of whether rich
countries
 should provide economic
assistance
 to poor
countries
 or if other forms of
assistance
 can help solve
poverty
 problems has sparked heated discussions in society. Some people believe that offering financial
assistance
 is the most effective way to combat
poverty
,
whereas
 others contend that targeted aid in other areas would be more beneficial for impoverished nations. I believe that providing other forms of aid can help to address the root causes of
poverty
 in developing
countries
. On the one hand, rich
countries
 can provide material
assistance
 to poor
countries
 by providing food, drinking water, and other specific items that meet the basic needs of impoverished individuals.
This
 improves their quality of life and addresses the issue of
poverty
.
Moreover
, the international community can send economists to poor
countries
 as heads of finance departments to provide effective economic advice. In
this
 manner, underdeveloped nations can advance their economies and reduce
poverty
.
In addition
, other
countries
 can send technical personnel to less developed
countries
 or provide technical
assistance
 by exporting technical equipment and establishing local factories directly.
This
 will increase industrial output and promote economic prosperity.
This
 helps less-developed
countries
 to eliminate
poverty
 and backwardness.
On the other hand
, providing economic
assistance
 to poor and underdeveloped
countries
 can help them purchase daily necessities or other materials that can alleviate
poverty
.
However
,
while
such
assistance
 may temporarily alleviate
poverty
, it cannot fundamentally reverse the challenging situation in the country. Generally speaking, developed
countries
 provide more substantial aid to impoverished nations, which can better address the issue of
poverty
 in these regions.
Submitted by y2083749065 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: