Some people think that art is an essential subject for children at school while others think it is a waste of time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some individuals believe that art is

Change the article

show examples

substantial

topics

Change the noun form

topic

show examples

for

children

Use synonyms

school

Use synonyms

whereas

Linking Words

others feel

that

Linking Words

Correct your spelling

show examples

is a waste of time. In my perspective, the

curriculum

Use synonyms

school

Use synonyms

should focus on useful subjects

such

Linking Words

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

science

Use synonyms

technology

Correct word choice

and technology

show examples

rather than

arts

Use synonyms

. On the one hand, some argue that

arts

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such

Linking Words

as, painting, music,

Correct word choice

and theater

show examples

theater

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theatre

show examples

should be part

Change preposition

show examples

the

curriculum

Use synonyms

school

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

is because

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

arts

Use synonyms

can

boosts

Change the verb form

boost

show examples

creativity

Change preposition

show examples

children

Use synonyms

For example

Linking Words

, painting can make

children

Use synonyms

thinking

Wrong verb form

think

show examples

out of

box

Add an article

the box

show examples

and increase their imagination.

Furthermore

Linking Words

researches

Fix the agreement mistake

research

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showed

Wrong verb form

has shown

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that

arts

Use synonyms

can help

Verb problem

apply

show examples

mitigate

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

stress and help

students

Use synonyms

Verb problem

apply

show examples

relax.

Therefore

Linking Words

arts

Use synonyms

can assist

to increase

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in increasing

show examples

the performance of

students

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others

Correct quantifier usage

other

show examples

subjects.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, I would like to agree with those people who believe that the

curriculum

Use synonyms

should concentrate

Change preposition

show examples

valuable topics

instead

Linking Words

arts

Use synonyms

. To

being

Verb problem

begin

show examples

with, the

arts

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does

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not provide vital services to society, because

arts

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only

Add a missing verb

are only

show examples

for entertainment, and

then

Linking Words

the

school

Use synonyms

should focus

to teach

Change preposition

on teaching

show examples

students

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science

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and technology.

The

Correct your spelling

This

show examples

due to

Linking Words

the fact that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

we need a lot of

porfessional

Correct your spelling

professional

professionals

in different fields, medicine, engineering, IT, because

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society

need

Change the verb form

needs

show examples

this

Linking Words

occupation in order to live

better

Correct article usage

a better

show examples

live

Replace the word

life

show examples

For instance

Linking Words

, when

Correct article usage

the Covid-19

show examples

Covid-19

Correct your spelling

COVID-19

show examples

pandemic started , the medical staff

play

Wrong verb form

played

show examples

a significant role

to prevent

Change preposition

in preventing

show examples

to get

Change preposition

from getting

show examples

this

Linking Words

virus, which

Linking Words

this

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

indicated the importance of

educate

Change the verb form

educating

show examples

students

Use synonyms

Change preposition

about

show examples

science

Use synonyms

instead

Linking Words

arts

Use synonyms

. In conclusion, In my opinion, teaching

children

Use synonyms

arts

Use synonyms

is considered

waste

Add an article

a waste

show examples

of money and time, and the

curriculum

Use synonyms

should concentrate

crucial

Change preposition

on crucial

show examples

subjects namely

science

Use synonyms

technology

Correct word choice

and technology

show examples

, because it

is provide

Change the verb form

provides

show examples

necessary services to communities.

faiz3177

Jun 29, 2023

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Conclusion

Your introductory paragraph presents both views and your opinion clearly, but the conclusion is weak. It does not effectively summarize your main points and opinion. Ensure that your conclusion is strong and clearly restates your main arguments and opinion.

Supporting points

You have some supporting points for both views, but some of your arguments lack development. Make sure to elaborate on each point by providing examples, reasons, and explanations in order to fully support your claims.

Logical structure

Your essay has a logical structure, but the development of ideas is inconsistent. Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that your points are developed coherently throughout the essay.

Task response

Your ideas are relevant to the topic, but the response may not fully address all aspects of the question. Ensure that you provide a balanced discussion of both views and give a clear opinion with supporting arguments.

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
44
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

266 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

self-expression
critical thinking
problem-solving
cultural awareness
tolerant society
STEM subjects
employability
rigorous subjects
curriculum
school budgets
enriches
complements

What to do next:

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Some people think that art is an essential subject for children at school while others think it is a waste of time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In many cities, the use of video cameras in public places is being increased in order to reduce crime, but some people believe that these measures restrict our individual freedom. Do the benefits of increased security outweigh the drawbacks?

Some people think that newspapers are the best way to get news. However, others believe that other media are better sources of news. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that government should invest in wildlife projects and protect them. Other people think it is better if government invests money in other projects. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In many cities there is a lack of space to develop and as a result, in order to modernise, old buildings are demolished and replaced with new buildings. What are the disadvantages of knocking down old buildings? Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?