Some think that the government should tax unhealthy food to uncourage people to eat healthier. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Eating
habit
Fix the agreement mistake
habits
show examples
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
left too much impact on human life. The impact of
this
has made many think about solutions to
this
. As a matter of that, people think that a high rate of tax on junk
food
can be a solution to the issue. I believe forcing a high rate of
taxes
cannot change
any ones
Correct your spelling
anyone's
show examples
eating habits.
Firstly
, high
rates
of
taxes
will increase the price of fast
food
, which divert to having healthy
food
, in solving many health issues. In countries like Australia, the authority charges high
rates
of
taxes
on
sugar base
Correct your spelling
sugar-based
show examples
drinks in comparison to other drinks.
In addition
, the revised
rates
allow any government to have more income. That can be useful for the development of the country like, new roads and better medical and health services.
On the other hand
, the implementation of high
taxes
is going to affect pockets of the middle
class
or the poor
class
. The increased price of fast
food
will
make
Verb problem
apply
show examples
divert them towards cheap and unhealthier
food
stores.
While
the
riches
Correct your spelling
rich
show examples
class
of society will be unbothered by a hike of
food
.
In addition
, an increment in street foods will definitely force all
food
industries to change the
rates
. It will be hard for many
food
chains to survive with the hike. As per a survey, recently almost 20% of
food
restaurants have winded up their business.
This
caused a 1%
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
downfall in the income of the government. In conclusion, implementing
taxes
on unhealthy
food
will distract many towards nutritious
food
and will allow to have some extra income for the government In most cases hike in convenience
food
will affect both the middle and the poor
class
. In my ,opinion extra
taxes
will not make much impact on the lifestyle of many in society.
Submitted by jaimini2000 on

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task response
In the introduction, clearly state your position (agree or disagree) with the statement in the prompt.
coherence and cohesion
Improve the structure of the essay by organizing the ideas in a more coherent manner. Ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and supports the main argument effectively.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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