Many people spend a large amount of money on celebrating birthdays and weddings. Others think that it is unnecessary to spend so much on these events. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
Some would argue that a person should celebrate a marriage or birthday lavishly,
while
others say that a minimal amount should be spent. Linking Words
Although
having a lavish function proves as a status symbol, I believe that having a simple ceremony serves the purpose.
On the one hand, some individuals argue that having extravagant functions reflects how Linking Words
much
worthy the family or an individual is. Showcasing of wealth has become a ritual during ceremonies as it sets a case of how good they are doing in their life. Fix the agreement mistake
apply
For example
, during the wedding of their daughter the billionaire of India Mr. Mukesh Ambani Linking Words
spend
a whooping amount of $300 million. Wrong verb form
spent
However
, middle-class, family they ought to take out loans merely to meet the minimum standards set by society.
Linking Words
On the other hand
, some individuals believe that having a tiny function fulfils the meaning. It helps the community to set up a clear example that the whole value of having Linking Words
this
is to share the happiness with the members and not display who is rich or poor. Linking Words
For instance
, Linking Words
due to
Covid, regulations the limit of guests was set for a maximum of 50 close people, which people are still following. Linking Words
This
demonstrates that the significance of having a celebration should be relatives, not money.
In conclusion, Linking Words
although
spending a hefty amount shows how dignitary a person is, I firmly believe that spending less creates a strong illustration of how a person should act as per their standard and be Linking Words
debt free
.Add a hyphen
debt-free
Submitted by karanmehtap7 on
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Task Response
The conclusion needs to summarize the main points and restate the writer's opinion clearly. It should not introduce new information.
Coherence and Cohesion
There is some logical structure in the essay, but the introduction and conclusion could be more clearly outlined. Also, the link between ideas within paragraphs could be improved for better coherence.