IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The table shows information about metro systems in six different cities.

The table shows information about metro systems in six different cities.
The table illustrates the information about public transportation and compares six different metro systems which are located
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 3 different Continents , Asia , Europe and North America. New York City
subway
Use synonyms
 has a total of 24
lines
Use synonyms
 which is the highest number of
lines
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the list with a distance covered of around 659
miles
Use synonyms
 and annual journeys being at 1.65
billion
Use synonyms
 with 2.50$ a single
ticket
Use synonyms
. Followed by the second largest
Subway
Use synonyms
 system in the list located in Beijing, China with 19
lines
Use synonyms
 covering a length of 357
miles
Use synonyms
 and per
ticket
Use synonyms
 costing around 0.45$ and the largest number of annual journeys up to 3.6
billion
Use synonyms
 passengers. ,
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
,However
show examples
 We can see that the Paris metro has 16 which cover a distance of 127
miles
Use synonyms
 with a
ticket
Use synonyms
 being around $2.30. London's tube has 11
lines
Use synonyms
 which cover around 249
miles
Use synonyms
 with 1.2
billion
Use synonyms
journey
Change to a plural noun
journeys
show examples
 with a single
ticket
Use synonyms
 costing $7.30 the most expensive
ticket
Use synonyms
 in the whole list.
However
Linking Words
, Mexico City metro has 12
lines
Use synonyms
 which cover an area of 140
miles
Use synonyms
 with a cost of $0.23 per
ticket
Use synonyms
. Mexico's
subway
Use synonyms
 is
least
Correct article usage
the least
show examples
 expensive which can save a lot of money with 1.6
billion
Use synonyms
travelers
Change the spelling
travellers
show examples
. Tokyo's
Subway
Use synonyms
 has 13
lines
Use synonyms
 with a distance covered up to 189
miles
Use synonyms
 and 3.1
billion
Use synonyms
 people travel with tickets being at $1.64.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
▼
Linking words: Add more linking words.
▼
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
▼
Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
▼
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 71%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words subway, lines, miles, billion, ticket with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 4 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: