Although parents are responsible for raising a child, outside influence plays a key role in their development. To what extent do you agree or disagree

#parents #child #influence #role #development

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There is no doubt that a parent's duty is to safeguard and protect their children.

This

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is a norm, but apart from that, worldly experiences

also

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shape their personal growth. I strongly agree with the above statement, and I will

further

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emphasize my position in the following essay. As we know already, parents provide children with basic requirements

such

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as food, shelter, education etc. Our parents have provided us with that plus we have

also

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learnt certain morals from them.

While

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this

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is true, you can

also

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notice some differences in their personalities when they grow up.

This

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is because they learn different things from new people in schools, colleges, etc.

For example

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, in the current era,

kids

Use synonyms

these days are observed to be more mature than their family members owing to the evolution of the internet and social media.

This

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trend has been triggering a significant amount of mindset change in younger people nowadays.

Secondly

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, there are many families where

kids

Use synonyms

prove to be more successful than their immediate family members as they sometimes pursue ambitions which their family opposes. These are

due to

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their personal desires, which they develop through their experience in schools or colleges.

Besides

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that, some people

also

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get inspired by the societal problems they face and aspire to pursue a career similar to that of their friends.

For example

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, many

kids

Use synonyms

who study abroad during their younger age become more mature than their family members and possess different personal values that of their family. These all changes are happening because their personal struggles have changed their mindset.

Hence

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, it is ideal to say that outside influences mould them the most. In conclusion,

although

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parents teach us important morals with basic survival needs, most of their personalities are shaped by their own experiences. If you notice, some

kids

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suffer from personality disorders

such

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as autism, anxiety, etc., because they might have been raised around their family environment only and

due to

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this

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, they might lack some social skills.

Therefore

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, I believe that it is more acceptable to say that outside influences affect them majorly.

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coherence cohesion

Use topic sentences to clearly introduce each paragraph and ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main point.

task response

Ensure that the essay addresses all aspects of the question and presents a clear position. Develop each main point with specific examples and elaborate on how these examples support the main argument.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

349 words

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Although parents are responsible for raising a child, outside influence plays a key role in their development. To what extent do you agree or disagree

In future all cars will be driverless cars, in your opinion are advantages outweigh disadvantages?

Some people feel that manufacturers and supermarkets have the responsibility to reduce the amount of packaging of goods. While others argue that customers should avoid buying goods with a lot of packaging. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Due to advances in technology, working from home has become more popular. What are the advantages? What are the disadvantages?