IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The chart below shows the results of a ssurvey about people's cffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Asutralian cities.

The chart below shows the results of a ssurvey about people's cffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Asutralian cities.
#results #ssurvey #people #cffee #tea #habits #five #asutralian #cities
The given bar chart illustrates the percentages of
Australia
Correct your spelling
Australian
show examples
residents
 who buy
coffee
 and tea and
also
 their drinking habits.
Overall
, it can be clearly seen that going to a
coffee
 for drinking
coffee
 and tea in the
last
 month is the most popular drinking
habits
Fix the agreement mistake
habit
show examples
 in five different cities in Australia, except for Adelaide.
In contrast
, the least percentage of drinking
habit
Fix the agreement mistake
habits
show examples
 is
buy
Wrong verb form
buying
show examples
 fresh
coffee
. Looking at the information in more detail,
Sydey
Correct your spelling
Sydney
 is the
Austarlia
Correct your spelling
Australian
 city that has the most consumers
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 fresh
coffee
 at 43%. Meanwhile, Brisbane and
Adelide
Correct your spelling
Adelaide
 have the same percentage of
residents
 who buy fresh
coffe
Correct your spelling
coffee
.
Furthermore
, purchasing instant
coffee
 is the second
popular
Correct quantifier usage
most popular
show examples
 drinking habit in Australia,
in
Change preposition
with
show examples
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
between
Change preposition
apply
show examples
around 46% and 52%
residents
Change preposition
of residents
show examples
 where Brisbane is
highest
Correct article usage
the highest
show examples
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
this
 category. Among the three drinking habits, buying
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
coffee
 and tea in the cafe is the most popular. Hobart and Melbourne have the highest proportion of their
residents
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
this
 category at approximately 63%. The lowest proportion
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
 people who go to
Add an article
a cafe
the cafe
show examples
cafe
Fix the agreement mistake
cafes
show examples
 for drinking is
Adelide
Correct your spelling
Adelaide
 at just under 50%.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words residents, coffee with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: