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Band 4

Some believe technology has made our lives too complex and the solution is to lead a simpler life with out technology.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#believe #technology #lives #life
The following essay takes a look at both sides of the argument.The first and leader opinion is that
technology
 has done more harm than good profits.So humans have to try to simplify its effects.Another factor to consider is that
technology
shutting
Wrong verb form
shuts
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 everyone off from real
life
.Remember the past times,in those times all people who were workers had to work from 9 o’clock a.m to 5 o’clock p.m.
Wheb
Correct your spelling
When
 the work hours finished,they were returning own home directly and dealt with family members.So it
leaded
Correct your spelling
led
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 to more
fullfilling
Correct your spelling
fulfilling
 lives.
However
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,However
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at
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apply
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now most people when come
to
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apply
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home start to answer phone calls or write e-mails about their work
instead
 of relaxing.
Hence
,they cannot spend enough time with their families and it
effects
Correct your spelling
affects
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 badly to private
life
.
On the other
hand
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,hand
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according to
 me,we can’t turn away from
new
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newly
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 developed technologies,which creates useful
condition
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conditions
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 for us to stay in touch with friends,workmates,groupmates,
even
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and even
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 relatives
which
Correct pronoun usage
who
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 are far from us.It seems to me that social media programmes are essential for everyone.Directly calling with
phone
Correct article usage
a phone
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more
Add a missing verb
is more
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 expensive than
whatsapp’s
Correct your spelling
WhatsApp’s
cheaply
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cheap
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 chat.These type of means of communication is
indispensable
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an indispensable
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 element of our social
life
.
Besides
 we can filter out our necessary jobs and give priority to essential
works
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work
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. In summary, it appears that how
technology
make
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makes
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affect
Replace the word
effect
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to
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apply
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our
life
(make
complex
Correct pronoun usage
it complex
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 or make simplify it)
it
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apply
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just depends on how to use it.Compartmentalise
technology
 is one of the most important issues and it gives us more satisfying lives.
Also
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,Also
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 we can search
new
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for new
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,essential and educational information on Internet
web sites
Correct your spelling
websites
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,which is not possible to find
them
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apply
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without
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the internet
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internet
Capitalize word
Internet
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.Nowadays there are gadgets at everyone’s home and they are part of our social
life
.
Submitted by Ayan on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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