Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people pf different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?

#people #music #pf #cultures #ages

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It is often thought that

music

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is one of the most crucial ways, which

supports

Wrong verb form

support

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the unification of

people

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even though they have various customs, habits, ages, or are from different places around the world. In

this

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essay, we will discuss

this

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topic, and I completely agree with

this

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view. At the outset, humankind generally considers

music

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as one of the most important tools of enjoyment, because if anybody experiences stressful conditions or anxiety, he will listen to

music

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, as; it provides him with a good feeling of relaxation.

Hence

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, some psychiatric doctors advise their patients to listen to it, particularly in case of being worried,

therefore

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; their mood will improve.

In addition

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to that, when

people

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listen to

music

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daily,

this

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good behaviour will keep them away from psychological diseases.

Moreover

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, if the mood of the employees is good because of listening to

music

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, they will work hard, and the economic status of the country will improve.

However

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people

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from different countries, and speak other languages, but all of them like

music

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, and use it for the same purposes.

For example

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, if anyone travels to a foreign country for tourism, he will find a lot of

music

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concerts, and

then

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he will buy a ticket to attend

this

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music

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festival.

Firstly

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although

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there are different types of

music

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for instance

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, Arabic, American, Indian, or British, all of them are attractive.

Secondly

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, if we search about the attitudes of the population, we will be amazed, because some Indian folk prefer to listen to Arabic

music

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while

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as, some Arab humankind like to hear Indian

music

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. In conclusion,

music

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has lots of global positive consequences, especially because it makes the mood of humans better, and it can be used as a therapy to treat some illnesses.

Thus

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, I believe that

music

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can unify

people

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all over the world because all of them obtain the same advantages

as a result

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of listening to it.

Submitted by sm710129 on Mon Jul 03 2023

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Task Response

The essay effectively discusses the topic and provides arguments to support the agreement with the statement. Make sure to address any potential opposing views as well for a more balanced argument.

Coherence and Cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion. The ideas are effectively presented and connected throughout the essay. Consider using transition words to enhance the coherence even further.

Task Response

Clear stance on the topic and supporting arguments

Coherence and Cohesion

Effective introduction and conclusion

15
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

322 words

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Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people pf different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?

Some countries achieve international sports by building specialised facilities to train top athletes, instead of providing sports facilities that everyone can use. Do you think this is positive or negative development? Discuss both views and give your opinion.

These days, more and more people are going to other countries for significant periods of time, either to find a job or to study. There are clearly many benefits to doing this, but people who live abroad can also face some difficulties.

Some people believe that social media sites, such as Facebook or Twitter, have a negative impact on young people and their ability to form personal relationships. Others believe that these sites bring people together in

In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?