Some people think that visiting museums is the best way for children to learn history, while many others think there are several better ways. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Nowadays, it is often believed by a bunch of critics,
roaming
Correct word choice
that roaming
show examples
into museums can be fruitful for adolescents to study the past
however
, legions opposing the thought, think there are a plethora of good ways. I will be outlining both views before putting my pen down and thinking. History can be
understandable
Replace the word
understood
show examples
by going to exhibitions where things are collected and preserved.
Firstly
, ancient collections can provide a great knowledge of the culture, myths etc of a civilization.
For example
, a recent survey conducted on school goings attending museums
tend
Wrong verb form
tended
show examples
to know more about the past than the folks not going.
Secondly
, it can help them to enrich their knowledge about a leader or war weapons as underneath everything displayed from the days before having a description.
On the contrary
, there are legions of medians that can be helpful to enlighten the study of history.
To begin
with, the internet and books can be very crucial and easy ways to broaden the idea of societies from the centuries before.
For instance
, people who are not too outgoing can
be benefited
Wrong verb form
benefit
show examples
from these as they can perform research by sitting at or going to a library.
Furthermore
, youngsters can visit different historical places and meet with people of that particular region, resulting in gaining an adequate idea of their culture and the famousness of the place.
To conclude
, it is vital to show them a range of paths when it comes to gathering knowledge.
Therefore
, I believe in my humble opinion, they need to be encountered with various methods of learning rather than confining them to one.
Submitted by yeahyeamin on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure that the introduction clearly presents the main topic and the conclusion effectively summarizes the key points of the essay.
task achievement
Provide more specific and relevant examples to support your main points, and ensure that your ideas are consistently focused on the task prompt.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: