The gap between rich and poor is growing . What problems does this create ? What can be done to tackle them

#gap #create

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In the world today, we can see that the

gap

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between rich and poor is widening.

This

Linking Words

can make a lot of problems. In

this

Linking Words

essay, I will discuss the complications

this

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trend can create and

also

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offer some solutions. The most important problem is

elevation

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an elevation

the elevation

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crime

Correct article usage

the crime

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rate. The reason might be the fact that when the poor watch affluent individuals they make comparisons in their subconscious mind and ,

then

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, every unacceptable

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

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becomes acceptable to them.

Thus

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, they start offending others by means of robbery or something like that.

For instance

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, when the police caught many robbers, they confessed that their incentive was how some wealthy families behave and they want to have their wealth.

Moreover

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, as

this

Linking Words

gap

Use synonyms

grows,

education

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then

Linking Words

limited to people who have more finance.

This

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is because of the fact that only affluent families can support their offspring,

while

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the child in a rural

area

Fix the agreement mistake

areas

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have to work alongside their parents to make ends meet.

Therefore

Linking Words

Correct article usage

apply

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rural

child

Fix the agreement mistake

children

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do not have enough time for

education

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the

Correct article usage

apply

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most

schools

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are far from their residence and they have to

spent

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spend

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their time on farmland.

For example

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, many private

schools

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offer better training facilities for children, and they are only available to rich ones. In order to tackle these problems, authorities have to make

education

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obligatory and free for

everyone

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until the age

Change preposition

of 15

show examples

Everyone

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has the right to benefit from the best facilities provided at

schools

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and the

gap

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will eradicate

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apply

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when private

schools

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become available to

everyone

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In addition

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, a minimum wage

have

Change the verb form

has

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determined

Add a missing verb

be determined

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Thus

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, no one has to commit a crime for

the

Change the word

their

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primary needs. In conclusion, as

this

Linking Words

gap

Use synonyms

widens, many complications are created. An elevation in crime rate and

lack

Correct article usage

a lack

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of well-educated individuals are the most vital issues. People in power should try to tackle these problems.

For example

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, by offering free

education

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for

everyone

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and setting a minimum wage for

who

Correct pronoun usage

those who

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works

Correct subject-verb agreement

work

show examples

Submitted by sheida95jahanbekam on Tue Jul 04 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

326 words

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The gap between rich and poor is growing . What problems does this create ? What can be done to tackle them

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In some countries, a high proportion of criminal acts are committed by teenagers. What is the cause? What can be done to deal with this.

The most important aim of scence should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In many parts of world, children and teenagers are committing more crimes. what are the causes? how should these young criminals to be punished?

News media is important in our society. Why is it so important? Do you think its influence is generally positive or negative?

Many people say that globalisation and the growing number of multinational companies have a negative effect on the environment. To what extent do you agree or disagree?