IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Some people believe that sport is an essential part of school life for children, while others feel like it should be purely optional.Discuss both these opposing views and give your opinion

#people #sport #part #school #life #children
Many individuals have the opinion that physical activity is an imperative subject in educational institutions,
whereas
 ,others think that it should be entirely optional, namely,children should be given the right to decide whether or not they want to enter them.
Thus
this
 essay will discuss the cons and pros of the topic. On the one hand, the benefits of
sports
 are uncountable.First of all, playing
sports
 help to increase cardiovascular fitness and improve the healthy growth of bones, muscles, ligaments and tendons.
Secondly
, it reduced the risk of obesity.
Furthermore
,
sports
 are essential to society and can unite people, strengthen communities and improve physical health.
On the other hand
, It is argued by many that
sports
 should be optional. They believe that students should focus on school subjects
such
 as Math, Science and English than physical activity.
In addition
,
sports
 can
also
 be expensive, dangerous, time-consuming and lead to injuries. Another negative of doing
sports
 is it can be an additional expense for the parents. In conclusion, I believe that the advantages of physical subjects in schools outweigh the disadvantages. Generally,
sports
 can have many positive benefits on physical, psychological, social and emotional health.
Submitted by ieltsteaching0 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: