Nowadays technology is becoming more and more useful to youth. However, certain number of people tend to utilize social media for conversations with others and use for crucial news around the world. I believe that its advantages are overlapping its disadvantages.

There are plethora
advantages
Change preposition
of advantages
show examples
of
technologies
Fix the agreement mistake
technology
show examples
.
Firstly
, people can share information in a short time period
as well as
over long distances. To explain it more, in
modern
Add an article
the modern
show examples
era, if a person
live
Change the verb form
lives
show examples
in a
foriegn
Correct your spelling
foreign
country, family members o friends can talk with them through various apps
such
as Facebook, Whatsapp, Instagram,
Gmail
Correct word choice
and Gmail
show examples
.
For instance
, 80% of students use applications
different
Change preposition
for different
show examples
futures like video call,
voice
Correct word choice
and voice
show examples
call
becuase
Correct your spelling
because
it is
cheapest
Change the article
the cheapest
show examples
way or
they
Correct word choice
if they
show examples
choose calling
then
they want to pay
big
Add an article
a big
show examples
amount of money for roaming.
As a result
, students can save
lot
Change the article
a lot
show examples
of money by doing that, and utilize
on
Correct pronoun usage
it on
show examples
monthly expenses.
Moreover
, people can get
cruicial
Correct your spelling
crucial
news
from the internet by which
updated
Wrong verb form
update
show examples
theirself
Correct your spelling
themselves
show examples
. To explicate,
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
their
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
own
benefitssuch
Correct your spelling
benefits such
as
masses
Correct article usage
the masses
show examples
can see
latest
Change the article
the latest
show examples
news
on mobile phones to compare with Television,
becuase
Correct your spelling
because
that
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
news
broadcast
Add a missing verb
is broadcast
show examples
in
evening
Add an article
the evening
show examples
not at a time.
In addition
to
this
, technologies are helping us in every sector.
For example
, in India, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Add an article
the machinaries
show examples
machinaries
Correct your spelling
machineries
in Factories and Mills run
automaticly
Correct your spelling
automatically
by using technology
set-up
Correct your spelling
setup
show examples
.
As a result
, factory owners do not need to hire
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
more experts for machinery. In conclusion, individuals are more
rely
Replace the word
reliant
show examples
on technology nowadays because it
help
Change the verb form
helps
show examples
us in many ways like gathering via video call, and
get
Wrong verb form
getting
show examples
latest
Change the article
the latest
show examples
news
around the world.
Submitted by arshpreetmalkana on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: