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Writing Samples
Band 7

The best way to teach children to cooperate is through team sports at school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The assertion that
team
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sports
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 are the best method to teach youngsters how to cooperate is a viewpoint that has gained considerable attention.
Although
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team
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sports
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 can indeed foster collaboration
skills
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, I believe that there are other effective avenues for teaching
cooperation
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 as well. Essentially,
team
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sports
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 are very efficient when it comes to teaching young people how to cooperate with each other. Through a competitive environment, teenagers develop teamwork
skills
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, self-esteem and strategising.
For example
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, students can have many opportunities to recognise the strengths
as well as
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 the shortcomings of each teammate which can be used to better compete against their opponents, especially in
sports
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 with more than 5 participants
such
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 as football, volleyball and basketball.
Additionally
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, playing
sports
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also
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 stimulates a working environment where people work towards a common goal together.
Thus
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, pupils learn how to work together more effectively when they engage in these sporting
activities
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.
On the other hand
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, it is important to recognize that
cooperation
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skills
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 can be cultivated through a range of
activities
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 beyond
team
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sports
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.
Firstly
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, cooperative learning strategies in classrooms, group projects, community service
activities
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 and even creative pursuits like theatre or music can
also
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 provide valuable opportunities for young adults to develop collaboration
skills
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. In fact, these
activities
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 promote
cooperation
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, and the ability to work effectively in a group setting. They encourage the youth to understand diverse perspectives, value teamwork and appreciate the benefit of collective effort.
Secondly
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, not all offspring may be inclined toward or have the opportunity to participate in
team
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sports
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.
Thus
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, it is essential to provide a range of
activities
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 and environments that cater to diverse interests or abilities, ensuring that all youngsters have a chance to develop their
cooperation
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skills
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. In conclusion,
while
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team
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sports
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 offer valuable opportunities for teaching offspring to cooperate, I believe that
cooperation
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skills
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 can be developed through a variety of
activities
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 and environments. By providing a balanced approach that includes all
activities
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, we can effectively nurture the value and skill of
cooperation
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 in adolescents.

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coherence cohesion
Provide more specific examples to support your points.
lexical resource
Rephrase the word 'offspring' to avoid repetition.
lexical resource
Be more precise in your use of vocabulary.
grammatical range accuracy
Use a wider range of sentence structures, such as complex and compound sentences.
coherence cohesion
Consider adding a sentence or two to expand on your conclusion.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • cooperation
  • teamwork
  • communication
  • values
  • applied
  • aspects
  • belonging
  • camaraderie
  • participating
  • essential
  • social skills
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