IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Houses are essential for people. Some people think that the government should offer free houses for people who cannot afford to pay for it. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#houses #people #government #offer
In today’s society,
houses
 are necessary for everyone,
thus
 some
people
 argue that for those who do not have the ability to buy a house, the
government
 has the responsibility to provide free
houses
 for them. In my opinion, I tend to disagree with
this
 point of view. The phenomenon that more and more young
people
 cannot afford to pay for a house is ubiquitous nowadays.
This
 is
due to
 an increase in the unemployment rate and a decrease in disposable income, and
also
 a rise in the price of
houses
.
Therefore
, it is challenging for
people
 to buy
houses
.
For instance
, recent research done by China shows that, in the past ten years, the portion of
people
 who do not have their own
houses
 experienced a dramatic increase. So it is impossible for the
government
 to give each of them a free house,
this
 will not only increase the pressure on the
government
 budget but
also
 foster
people
’s dependence.
Moreover
, if the
government
 offer free
houses
 for
people
,
this
 will make
people
 lose their motivation for work, which can decrease productive efficiency and
thus
 lower the country’s GDP.
On the other hand
,
although
 it is impossible for the
government
 to provide free
houses
, the
government
 can give subsidies to those
people
 who have problems
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
buying
houses
 or those
people
 who have
income
Fix the agreement mistake
incomes
show examples
 lower than the average income.
As a result
,
people
 can have a chance to purchase
houses
 without losing their passion for working. In a nutshell, I believe that it is not the
government
's responsibility to give free
houses
,
people
 ought to own
houses
 through their own effort.
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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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