The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#aim #science #people’s #lives

It is argued that scientists must devote their

achieved

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

innovations and discoveries to enhancing human life. I totally agree with

this

statement, and I will discuss my reasons in the following paragraphs.

To begin

with, discoveries in health programs should

provide

Wrong verb form

be provided

show examples

to society. One of the paramount perspectives of nations is the sanitation system in their region. Enthusiastic Scientists acting in the laboratory, probe on the tissues and microbes to be ready for a rainy day. There will be endemic or pandemic diseases requiring addressed immediately by vaccines and some specialized restrictions. Considering the recent widespread infection, COVID-19,

this

crucial circumstance was on the investigators' shoulders, which use public welfare and amenities to reach their position, to tackle it and bring heath to boost the public against the virus.

In other words

, they owe to their society.

Furthermore

, human beings tend to live in a peaceful world which is a non-controversial right. Regarding

this

, the inventors must share their innovations having public aspects to other people access. Through

this

action, they can bring some crucial fundamental facilities into society.

For example

, if Thomas Edison, the American innovator, did not share the patents of his invented devices

such

as bubble lamps, individuals, nowadays, may never experience living at night.

However

, The scientists must be monitored by the authorities to prevent them from releasing unpleasant innovations or misusing by defrauding people. In conclusion, It seems that innovators ought to sacrifice themselves to their societies

due

Change preposition

apply

show examples

to provide a healthy community and a peaceful world.

Submitted by Omidrafsanjani.f on Tue Jul 11 2023

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coherence cohesion

There are several instances where sentence construction could be improved. It is crucial to ensure that your sentences flow naturally and maintain grammatical accuracy.

task achievement

There appears to be a misuse of certain terms and phrases. For instance, 'provide to society' should be 'provided to society'. It is important to ensure that terms and phrases are used correctly to enhance clarity.

task achievement

It is advisable to proofread your work to catch and correct typographical errors. For instance, 'heath' is possibly a typo for 'health'

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

252 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

crucial role
enhancing
quality of human life
advancements
medicine
healthcare
scientific research
solving societal problems
improving living standards
global issues
climate change
food scarcity
technological advancements
limitations
negative consequences
ethical considerations
sustainability
environmental preservation

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