Some people believe that hobbies need to be difficult to be enjoyable. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is argued that leisure activities have to be complex to be amusing.
However
, Linking Words
this
essay will disagree with the said statement. I believe that hobbies are chosen for their calming benefits Linking Words
as well as
a necessity for not challenging activities in order to leave their routine.
On the one hand, when selecting a leisure activity, individuals typically prioritize enjoyment and relaxation over the level of difficulty. Linking Words
Furthermore
, individuals decide on their hobby on how enjoyable it is and its simplicity since they have a need for relaxation, a need for a distraction from their busy lifestyle. Linking Words
For instance
, 50 % of the Spanish workforce usually decide to enjoy simple activities outside as a way to decompress from their hectic lives, and 30% of the previous proportion work in the medical industry.
Everyone, Linking Words
on the other hand
, is under pressure whether it is a student, an employee or a businessman. Linking Words
Therefore
, a mind-twisting, complicated and tiring activity is not going to help the human to be relaxed after a hectic day. Even worse, it can tire people more and decline their performance at their actual job. Linking Words
For example
, the University of Warwick’s survey in 2023 has proven that when an occupied individual plays an extreme sport Linking Words
such
as parachuting, their work capacity decreases by 25% every three months after starting the hobby.
In conclusion, for a vast part of the population and myself, enjoyable hobbies are not always complex. People would rather choose a certain activity for its calming benefits and as a way to break from their everyday life.Linking Words
Submitted by santos_dij on
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task achievement
Provide a clearer introduction by paraphrasing the essay prompt and clearly state your position within the introduction.
task achievement
Ensure you have a clear thesis statement that outlines the main points to be discussed in the essay.
task achievement
Enhance the conclusion by restating your viewpoint more clearly and summarizing the main points discussed in the essay.
coherence cohesion
Use a wider range of cohesive devices and transition words to improve the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Organize ideas into clear paragraphs, each starting with a topic sentence that directly relates to the thesis introduced in the first paragraph.
coherence cohesion
Develop paragraphs by including explanations of how the examples support the main idea, not just stating the examples themselves.