IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Art is considered an important part of a society as well as an expression of its culture. Do you think it is important for children to be taught art? Do you think children should be encouraged to focus on art rather than other subjects? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#art #part #society #expression #culture #children #focus #subjects
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There is an argument that
art
Use synonyms
 is an important element. I believe that developing a skill of outputting their thoughts is a more necessary ability than learning
art
Use synonyms
 during
childhood
Use synonyms
, and
children
Use synonyms
 should be encouraged to focus on their national language.
Art
Use synonyms
 could lead
children
Use synonyms
 to understand somebody, but the skills of understanding themselves and telling what they think is more important rather than understanding somebody first. Giving priority to improving their speaking and debating capabilities in their early life would help them when they communicate and work with various people in society.
For instance
Linking Words
, the National data shows that 95% of people around 16~22 who talked and debated during their elementary school classes have the confidence to understand somebody by speaking to each other, compared with those who were taught
art
Use synonyms
 in the same duration.
Thus
Linking Words
, learning
art
Use synonyms
 in
childhood
Use synonyms
 is not an essential part of society. Regarding an expression of its culture, learning a national language is more significant during
childhood
Use synonyms
 than
art
Use synonyms
 education because culture is output from thoughts created by different words, which
children
Use synonyms
 should learn when they are
children
Use synonyms
.
For instance
Linking Words
, the data from the National Search Institution shows that 80% of people with jobs related to its civilization read 100 books yearly, and 85% did not take
art
Use synonyms
 classes.
As a result
Linking Words
, meeting various and many words is more important than learning arts in
childhood
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, the skill of outputting their thoughts is important for
children
Use synonyms
's development.
In addition
Linking Words
, studying national languages is significant to impact the expression of its culture positively.
Submitted by loud.music.n on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: