All over the world, the number of overweight people is growing. What do you feel are the main causes of this ? What are the effect ?

#world #people #effect

Nowadays,

obecity

Correct your spelling

obesity

quite

Change the article

quite a

a quite

show examples

common problem, kids, adults,

seniors

Correct word choice

and seniors

show examples

have too much weight. Now, it is usual to see overweight people, but is

this

an illness? Or it is a

result

of our bad habits? And how we can fix that? Let's begin, with biochemical

processess

Correct your spelling

processes

in our

body

. First of all, we

need

Add the particle

toneed

show examples

know how

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

weight in our bodies changes. Change in

body

mass is the

result

metabolism

changes in our

body

metabolism

itself is the connection of chemical reactions, which can change in lots of situations.

For example

, if we don't have much

food

, our

metabolism

will react and begin to release fats to feed itself or store fats if there is too much of them.

However

, mostly in all

cases

Add a comma

,cases

show examples

obecity

Correct your spelling

obesity

is the

result

of diabetes or our lifestyle. Sometimes it is a random thing to have diabetes diseases, the

result

of it in some cases is overweight.

Besides

this

Add a comma

,this

show examples

there

are

Change the verb form

show examples

our bad

lyfestyle

Correct your spelling

lifestyle

lifestyles

cause. In modern times lots of people don't want to make

food

as a

result

Add the comma(s)

,result

show examples

they order junk

food

, slowly damaging their health and provoking

metabolism

changes.

Moreover

, our routine is simple we sit most

the

Change preposition

of the

show examples

time, because of laziness more and more people forget to exercise,

this

leads to

Correct article usage

a situatio

show examples

situatio

Correct your spelling

situation

situations

when extra calories don't release and again,

body

Add an article

the body

show examples

begins to store fats. As we know

obecity

Correct your spelling

obesity

has bad effects on our daily life.

For instance

, it can provoke heart diseases, bone problems etc.

To conclude

, mostly the leading overweight cause is the

result

of our bad lifestyle.

Obecity

Correct your spelling

Obesity

is the main reason for heart problems etc. The main method to fix that are

exercises

Fix the agreement mistake

exercise

show examples

and

blanced

Correct your spelling

balanced

healthy

food

Submitted by amur200617 on Wed Jul 12 2023

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction
Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

279 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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All over the world, the number of overweight people is growing. What do you feel are the main causes of this ? What are the effect ?

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

In many countries today,parents are able to choose to send their children to single sex schools or co educational schools. Some people think that children going to to single sex schools have disadvantages latter in life. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

In many societies, there is a growing emphasis on individualism, with people prioritizing their personal goals and desires over collective interests. Is this is a positive or negative development?

Some people think that young criminals should receive the same punishment as adults. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is important to give children the chance to act independently and make their own decisions from early age. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this idea?

Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to co-operate rather than compete become more useful adults.