IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Improvements in health, education and trade are essential for the development of poorer nations. However, the governments of richer nations should take more responsibility for helping the poorer nations in such areas. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

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Recent research shows that the government of richer
nations
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 is no longer seen as passive in helping poor
nations
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 but
also
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 takes responsibility for improving their health and
education
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 approaches.
Additionally
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, it is certain that there will be significant and increasing new helping programs from all over the world in
this
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 situation that show their wishes.
This
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 may be a result of immigration and a lack of
education
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 in poor
nations
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. Throughout
this
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 essay, I will present my thoughts on the subject, and provide examples to demonstrate the details of
this
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 true statement. Over the past ten years, I must state that the world has dramatically changed
due to
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 the widespread of the internet, wars in the Middle East and corona disease.
Consequently
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, many rich countries are making efforts to analyze how to help poor
nations
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, because if they do not,
this
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 will affect them badly in a short time. To take an example, take a look at the IMF, which helps and teaches poor
nations
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 to improve their knowledge.
As a result
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 of
this
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, they try to give money and send lots of teachers and doctors to control to stay in their own lands.
Moreover
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, the people of poor
nations
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 today do not get enough
education
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 as much as they used to because of the wars.
In other words
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,
education
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 is not given effectively by poor
nations
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, resulting in three out of four poor countries not operating their schools properly.
Therefore
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, most adults want to go abroad, especially in developed countries located in Europe. In conclusion, they must exert their best efforts to develop an accurate solution to solve the problem as soon as possible;
otherwise
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, they will continue to come forever. It is crucial to explore various methods to help them. It should not to forgotten that given data can be particularly misleading so we have to investigate the poor data which relates to
this
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 problem. In my opinion, the future of the poorer
nations
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 depends on how efficiently they use their resources and collective efforts are crucial for using a solution to
this
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 situation.

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task achievement
Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and purpose, which directly responds to the task question. Elaborate on these main ideas with clear examples and explanations.
coherence cohesion
Use a range of cohesive devices effectively to maintain coherence. Ensure paragraphs have clear topic sentences and the information flows logically from one sentence to the next.
task achievement
Expand on examples by providing specific details that are directly relevant to the task question. Avoid generic statements that could apply to any topic.
coherence cohesion
Work on providing a clear introduction that addresses the task question directly and a conclusion that summarizes the main points and relates them to the question.
task achievement
Make sure that the essay directly addresses the degree to which you agree or disagree with the given opinion throughout, using clear arguments to support your position.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • underdeveloped nations
  • economic disparity
  • global cooperation
  • moral obligation
  • historical exploitation
  • interconnected world
  • economic stability
  • quality of life
  • trade relationships
  • humanitarian aid
  • capacity building
  • dependency syndrome
  • sustainable development
  • bilateral agreements
  • economic priorities
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