IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The tv and the internet provide opportunity to ordinary people to become famous.Is this a positive or a negative development?

#tv #internet #opportunity #people #development
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It is an irrefutable fact that
the
Correct article usage
apply
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television and
the
Correct article usage
apply
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social media
provides
Correct subject-verb agreement
provide
show examples
 a large number of opportunities
to
Change preposition
for
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 common people to become popular.
Although
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 development has a darker side
however
Linking Words
 its positive cannot be ignored.Both
the
Correct article usage
apply
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sides would be discussed in the upcoming paragraphs. To commence with,the trend has some negative aspects.The most prominent reason is that
youth
Correct article usage
the youth
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 of the nation become addicted to the social
websities
Correct your spelling
websites
 where they can become popular.Many youngsters do anti-social activities to become famous and to earn some
money
Use synonyms
.To illustrate,young boys and girls make use of
gun
Fix the agreement mistake
guns
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while
Linking Words
 making videos by which become famous and get likes for that video. On the paradoxical side,the development has
number
Change the article
a number
the number
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 of positive aspects.
The first
Correct article usage
First
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 and foremost
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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youngsters get the chance to
show case
Correct your spelling
showcase
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 their talent.They got
the
Correct article usage
a
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 platform where they can show their skills to other people
such
Linking Words
 as dancing ,singing ,standup comedy and so on.To cite an example,an individual
makea
Correct your spelling
makes
make
 a short video
in
Change preposition
on
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 a mobile with the help of
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 they upload their videos on social networking sites by which they show their skills and become famous.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,they get
chance
Correct article usage
a chance
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 to earn
money
Use synonyms
.When they have more views on their post as per the company rules they got proper some
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
money
Use synonyms
.
As a result
Linking Words
,with the aid of
Use synonyms
Correct article usage
the Internet
show examples
Internet
Add a comma
,Internet
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 a person can become famous
over night
Correct your spelling
overnight
show examples
.
To conclude
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,after analyzing both
the
Correct article usage
apply
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aspects,I assert that television and the
internet
Use synonyms
 provide an opportunity
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 the public to showcase their skills
as well as
Linking Words
 to earn some amount of
money
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
,citizens use the
internet
Use synonyms
 wisely and avoid anti-social activities.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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