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Writing Samples
Band 5

Buying things in internet, such as books, air tickets and groceries is becoming more popular. Do advantage of this outweigh disadvantage.

#internet #books #air #tickets #groceries #advantage #outweigh
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In today's scenario,
people
Use synonyms
 buy their things like books, flight tickets and others via online shopping which is growing day by day. I suppose that upwards of
this
Linking Words
 phenomenon
outweigh
Correct subject-verb agreement
outweighs
show examples
 its drawbacks and
this
Linking Words
 essay will discuss it with its vast meaning. At the outset, nowadays, by growing of technology,
people
Use synonyms
 use the
Use synonyms
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
 almost in every field,
as well as
Linking Words
, it has
Correct article usage
an affect
show examples
affect
Correct your spelling
effect
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 on shopping. Especially, after
pandemic
Add an article
a pandemic
the pandemic
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 period it has been observed that
people
Use synonyms
endeavored
Change the spelling
endeavoured
show examples
 to buy their
necessity
Fix the agreement mistake
necessities
show examples
 via
Use synonyms
Add an article
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
, because of its convenience. In
other word
Change the wording
another word
other words
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,
by
Change preposition
apply
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buying technological way support
people
Use synonyms
time-saving
Change preposition
in time-saving
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 and a great range of choices
which
Correct word choice
but
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 sometimes humankind struggle with
this
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 issue. In
other word
Change the wording
another word
other words
show examples
, we may face
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
problems
such
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 as
as
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
size and colour of clothes,
queue
Correct word choice
and queue
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 hub in front of cashiers;
Linking Words
however
Add a comma
,however
show examples
 it has been solved by
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 with just one click.
Moreover
Linking Words
, we need by no means wait in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
queues to buy something,
instead
Linking Words
 of that, it will be better to buy with the greatest discovery of centuries-the
internet
Use synonyms
. To illustrate, statistics of a decade
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 shown that the
numbers
Fix the agreement mistake
number
show examples
 of
people
Use synonyms
 in the shopping areas decreased a bit comparatively to the previous years.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 those who prefer buying things by ordering, become unsocialized, especially
as
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
if that person is
introvert
Correct article usage
an introvert
show examples
. In its
broaden
Replace the word
broad
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 meaning, shopping provides entertainment, social activities and other things
besides
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 its own feature. Today, everybody especially
emloyees
Correct your spelling
employees
, have tied up with their work and by going shopping
mall
Fix the agreement mistake
malls
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 they appreciate
theri
Correct your spelling
their
 time,
as well as
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 share their ideas with their families and friends which is the best activity for
menthal
Correct your spelling
mental
 health. In a nutshell,
to buy
Change the verb form
buying
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 something
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
traditional
Correct article usage
the traditional
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 way has
positive
Add an article
a positive
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 effect on our relationships and psychological resting,
Linking Words
otherwise
Add a comma
,otherwise
show examples
 technology helps us
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
 providing flexibility and convenience.
Submitted by shabnam.aghayeva on

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Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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