TODAY,MORE PEOPLE ARE TRAVELING THAN EVER BEFORE.WHY IS THIS CASE?WHAT ARE THE BENEFITS OF TRAVELING FOR THE TRAVELERS?

It is believed that in
this
era the
quantity
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
of people
go
Wrong verb form
going
show examples
travelling is higher than ever.
This
essay will discuss
about
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
many elements that affect significantly
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the travelling demand and shed light on the advantages of travelling for the voyagers On the one hand, there are multiple reasons explain why tourism is attracted recently.
Initially
, in
this
era, because of the
industrialzation
Correct your spelling
industrialization
and modernisation,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
aviation is more developing, there are more and more domestic and international flights around the world,
also
due to
the innovation of cheap air
travels
Correct subject-verb agreement
travel
show examples
so that payment for a trip is much more affordable and more dwellers can easily get those economical tickets.
Therefore
, tourism is much easier and more reasonable than in the past so that residents can enjoy travelling comfortably.
Additionally
, thanks to the innovation of the Internet, people can get access to many tours and travel agents
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
everywhere to find a suitable trip.
Moreover
,
Internet
Add an article
the Internet
show examples
also
can help people book hotel
room
Fix the agreement mistake
rooms
show examples
in advance to make sure they have a nice accommodation for their vacation. On the other side, there is no doubt that travelling
bring
Change the verb form
brings
show examples
many
advatages
Correct your spelling
advantages
for voyagers.
Firstly
, go travel can help everyone
relaxing
Wrong verb form
relax
show examples
and recover after an exhausting working period by immersing in the wonderful sceneries in a new land.
Secondly
, it is the
time
for many couples and families
spend
Fix the infinitive
to spend
show examples
time
with each other to
stongthen
Correct your spelling
strengthen
the family and love bond.
In addition
, it is a critical
time
to share the stories and
then
confide together to find a solution.
Finally
, voyagers can gain more life experiences through travelling
such
as
time
managements
Correct your spelling
management
show examples
skills, spending money moderately and
also
a new language,
cultural
Replace the word
culture
show examples
and
historical
Replace the word
history
show examples
of
local
Correct article usage
the local
show examples
place
Submitted by quynhtranhbh on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: