IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The map below is of the town of Garlsdon. A new supermarket (S) is planned for the town. The map shows two possible sites for the supermarket. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The map below is of the town of Garlsdon. A new supermarket (S) is planned for the town. The map shows two possible sites for the supermarket. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#town #garlsdon #supermarket #two #sites #summaries #information #features #comparisons
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The map
show
Change the verb form
shows
show examples
two
Use synonyms
 possible sites
two
Use synonyms
 build a new supermarket.
According to
Linking Words
 the map, the
town
Use synonyms
 is mainly covered by
housing
Correct article usage
a housing
show examples
 area, and at the
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
 of the
town
Use synonyms
, there is
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
no traffic zone. There are
two
Use synonyms
 industry areas in the
town
Use synonyms
. For the first one, S1, it is located
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the countryside, away from the
town
Use synonyms
 centre. S1 is nearby the railway, and it is only 12 km to travel from S1 to another
town
Use synonyms
 which is called Hinton. On the other side, S2 is located
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the south of Garlsdon, which is in the
town
Use synonyms
 centre. Not only is S2 close to the
raiway
Correct your spelling
railway
, but it
also
Linking Words
 has a shorter distance to most of the housing area than S1. From S2, people can go to
two
Use synonyms
 different places,
although
Linking Words
 they are both far from
Use synonyms
town
Add an article
the town
show examples
 centre, S2 still can have an opportunity to make money from three different towns.
Submitted by juinneuf231069buying on

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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words two, town with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "map" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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