People are responsible for their happiness. Others feel happiness depends on other factors in their life. Discuss both views and give your opinion?

#people #happiness #factors #life

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Some would argue that

happiness

Use synonyms

depends on other factors in their life like financial stability, health

status

Use synonyms

and social life,

while

Linking Words

other

Fix the agreement mistake

others

show examples

think that

people

Use synonyms

are responsible for their

happiness

Use synonyms

and they can obtain

this

Linking Words

status

Use synonyms

just by finding

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

inner peace. I think that

people

Use synonyms

need a certain amount of comfort to be happy and

this

Linking Words

includes

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

financial

status

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and social stability. On the one

hand

Add a comma

,hand

show examples

people

Use synonyms

are the only beings that can feel

emotions

Use synonyms

and find

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

inner peace.

Linking Words

Moreover

Add a comma

,Moreover

show examples

they can control their feelings and expose them.

For

Linking Words

example

Add a comma

,example

show examples

some of them can show their

emotions

Use synonyms

by playing

piano

Change the article

the piano

show examples

and

compose

Wrong verb form

composing

show examples

music,

others

Correct word choice

while others

show examples

draw on canvas to show their state of mind expressing

the

Change the word

their

show examples

actual feeling. It has been demonstrated that

people

Use synonyms

who express their feeling are more likely to find

the

Change the word

their

show examples

inner self and to be happy with it

Linking Words

then

Replace the word

than

show examples

the ones that choose to stay

quite

Correct your spelling

quiet

show examples

and keep the feelings

for

Change preposition

show examples

themselves.

On the other

Linking Words

hand

Add a comma

,hand

show examples

happines

Correct your spelling

happiness

is a subjective feeling and can be expressed in a different

way

Fix the agreement mistake

ways

show examples

. Many

people

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need more for

happiness

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like a big family and many friends, a good health

status

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and financial stability.

Linking Words

Furthermore

Add a comma

,Furthermore

show examples

the ability to generate money is one of the most important for

people

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because they can afford expensive properties, cars and luxury vacations and all of

Linking Words

this

Correct determiner usage

these

show examples

things

wil

Correct your spelling

will

generate a lot of

possitive

Correct your spelling

positive

emotions

Use synonyms

that define

happiness

Use synonyms

. A study that has been conducted in the USA shows that the state of

happiness

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derivered

Correct your spelling

derived

from the

amount

Change the quantifier

number

show examples

of positive

emotions

Use synonyms

we can get and all the

people

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receive positive

emotions

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from different activities and achievements, some of them are happy to spend time with friends and family,

while

Linking Words

others choose to work knowing that they will increase the incomes.

In other

Linking Words

words

Add a comma

,words

show examples

happiness

Use synonyms

has a different definition for each and

Change the capitalization

show examples

think that different factors like family, friends, health and money are my definition

for

Change preposition

show examples

happiness

Use synonyms

Submitted by aliaelarabi5 on Mon Jul 17 2023

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
27
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

323 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Self-reliance
Positive psychology
Socioeconomic status
Well-being
Mindset
Personal choices
Environmental factors
Interpersonal relationships
Emotional resilience
Quality of life
Subjective well-being
External circumstances

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People are responsible for their happiness. Others feel happiness depends on other factors in their life. Discuss both views and give your opinion?

Include an introduction and conclusion

In many Western countries, there are an increasing number of couples choosing to have no children. What are the advantages and disadvantages to the couples having no children.

More and more people are becoming seriously overweight. Some people think a solution can be to increase the price of fattening foods. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many countries raise fuel prices in order to deal successfully with problems pertaining to traffic and pollution. What effects do you think this move can have? What other measures do you think can be taken to reduce traffic and pollution?

Modern forms of communication such as email and messaging have reduced the amount of time people spend seeing their friends. This has a negative effect on their social lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that the best way to reduce the time that people spend travelling to work is to have large roads that go through the city centre. Others however, think that there are more effective ways to reduce the time people spend travelling to work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.