IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Nowadays , more andmorw people decide to have children later in their life. what are the reasons? Do the advantages of this outweigh disadvantages?

#andmorw #people #children #life #outweigh
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In
modern
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the modern
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 era,
young
Correct article usage
the young
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 generation take
decision
Fix the agreement mistake
decisions
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 for family planning when they become mature because it is one of the most important
decision
Change to a plural noun
decisions
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 in
married
Correct article usage
a married
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 couple’s
life
Use synonyms
. The main reason to have a
baby
Use synonyms
 in middle age is that
well educated
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well-educated
show examples
 people give preference to meet their financial
goal
Fix the agreement mistake
goals
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. I will discuss my views in detail in subsequent paragraphs.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, younger people mainly focus on
that
Correct word choice
apply
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how they can
Add a missing verb
be financial
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financial
Change the word
financially
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well settled
Add a hyphen
well-settled
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. Most
of
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apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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people, after completing their
education
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, do some jobs and get married either love or arrange. But they do not think about
to have
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having
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 a child unless they become financially responsible. Because it is difficult to raise a
baby
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 without having sufficient funds. When
couple
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a couple
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become
Change the verb form
becomes
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 financially independent they
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
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not only give
better
Correct article usage
a better
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Use synonyms
life style
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
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 to their children but
Linking Words
also
Add a missing verb
are also
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 able to give
high standard
Add a hyphen
high-standard
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education
Use synonyms
 in international schools or colleges.
For example
Linking Words
, if a child
want
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wants
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 to become a doctor after completing their higher
education
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then
Linking Words
 it is only possible when parents are financially strong.
As per
Change preposition
From
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 my perspective, when
couple
Add an article
a couple
the couple
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decide
Change the verb form
decides
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 to have a
baby
Use synonyms
 later
then
Linking Words
 it has more benefits than cons. No doubt, every
parents
Change to a singular noun
parent
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 always try to give quality
education
Use synonyms
 and
best
Correct article usage
the best
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 facilities to their children even
they
Correct word choice
if they
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 become parents
Change preposition
at in
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in
Correct your spelling
an
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 early age but if they become financially strong, they do not have any burden, how they will raise their children. Meanwhile,
relationship
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the relationship
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 between husband and wife
become
Correct subject-verb agreement
becomes
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 stronger because they spend quality time with each other.
To conclude
Linking Words
,
married
Correct article usage
a married
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 couple prefer to have a
baby
Use synonyms
 after
few
Correct article usage
a few
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 years of their married
life
Use synonyms
 because they do not want to be financially
depend
Replace the word
dependent
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 on someone.
Moreover
Linking Words
, it would help to make their bond strong and live
pleased
Add an article
a pleased
show examples
life
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by kaur444ranjeet on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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