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Band 6.5

We have three important parts of education: reading, writing and maths. Some people think every child will benefit from a fourth skill added to the list: computer skills. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#three #parts #education #maths #people #child #benefit #skill #list #computer #skills
In recent years, it is increasingly popular to be engrossed in
technology
.
While
 it is unnecessary to force schoolchildren to be into
technology
according to
 some, I believe that
computer
skills
 put
children
 one step ahead of others. On the one hand, we live in an era of
technology
. Computers make our life easier regardless of place. Technological improvements can vary in their benefits, and it is unavoidable that many workplaces, including government ,offices tend to use
technology
due to
 make their job easier and save their running costs. In 2002, the Azerbaijani government announced that all judgements should be passed by e-mail to the executive officers to accomplish. If one of their employees is bad at
technology
, they can not handle some problems
as well as
 they can not help to drive companies business successfully.
On the other hand
,
computer
skills
 will help
children
 for getting a secure job. Many people in our country are not taking the artificial intelligence sector seriously,
therefore
, their
children
 do not tend to insist on learning
computer
skills
. Today, the demand for AI is increasing rapidly and many foreign companies are willing to pay high sums for these workers,
thus
children
 will be better off. In future, robots can replace us and captivate our place in work. In that case,
children
 that are good at
technology
 can get out of
this
 situation and they, probably, find accurate jobs related to their
computer
skills
.
Otherwise
Add a comma
,Otherwise
show examples
 they can be between jobs and have to cope with financial issues. In South Korea, about 15% of their accountants are robots and the number climb up day-by-day.  In summary,
while
 some argue that technological
skills
 can be a huge burden for
children
, I consider that by getting knowledge of computers,
children
 will have a more chance to be well off in future and they can maintain their careers hardly.
Submitted by niftaliyeva_aysel on

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  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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