Nowadays, international tourism is the biggest industry in the world. Unfortunately, it creates tension rather than understanding between people from different cultures. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

this

Linking Words

modern era, it is easier to get in touch with one another from

other

Change the wording

another country

other countries

show examples

country

Use synonyms

which can build

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

cultural awareness than over the

last

Linking Words

10 years. People can use social media technology

such

Linking Words

as Facebook, Twitter,

Youtube

Correct your spelling

YouTube

show examples

Tiktok

Correct your spelling

TikTok

show examples

, or even an open-chat

in game

Add a hyphen

in-game

show examples

to communicate with a stranger that you do not know each other before.

However

Linking Words

, for the Tourism Industry which

recommend

Change the verb form

recommends

show examples

people

Fix the infinitive

apply

show examples

gain

first

Add a hyphen

first-hand

show examples

hand

Use synonyms

experience rather than the information on screen that might not be completely true. In

this

Linking Words

regard, I think it

Add a missing verb

is quiet

show examples

quiet

Correct your spelling

quite

show examples

hard for them to adapt themselves

with

Change preposition

show examples

the new

tradition

Use synonyms

not to mention

Linking Words

about language or food, but the real atmosphere you will gain when you

travel

Wrong verb form

are travelling

show examples

Change the verb form

does

show examples

not

make

Verb problem

cause

show examples

any

serius

Correct your spelling

serious

trouble

problem

Fix the agreement mistake

problems

show examples

, but

excited

Replace the word

excitement

show examples

to the tourist, I

believed

Wrong verb form

believe

show examples

. People in each

country

Use synonyms

have their own cultures and

Use synonyms

tradition

Fix the agreement mistake

traditions

show examples

which

Correct word choice

and

show examples

they share the same memorable historical activity together. To be honest, it

seem

Change the verb form

seems

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

some

nation

Fix the agreement mistake

nations

show examples

were already mix up

Use synonyms

Add an article

the tradition

show examples

tradition

Fix the agreement mistake

traditions

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

some point because of immigration in the past or

live

Wrong verb form

living

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

Correct article usage

the

show examples

same continent.

Thus

Linking Words

, tourists might not think these

culture

Change the determiner

cultures

show examples

were

Wrong verb form

are

show examples

completely new

for

Change preposition

show examples

them and become something that they

familiar

Add a missing verb

are familiar

show examples

with. Even

thought

Correct your spelling

though

show examples

, they can gain a

second

Add a hyphen

second-hand

show examples

hand

Use synonyms

experience

before

Change preposition

apply

show examples

when they

were

Wrong verb form

are

show examples

planning for their trip.

On the other

Linking Words

hand

Use synonyms

, it is

posible

Correct your spelling

possible

if tourists

paln

Correct your spelling

plan

for

Change preposition

show examples

travel to some

Use synonyms

country

Fix the agreement mistake

countries

show examples

that

far

Add a missing verb

are far

show examples

away from you

such

Linking Words

as from Europe to South Asia. If they

not

Change the verb form

do not

did not

show examples

prepare and study hard enough

while

Linking Words

they planning, they may have a

culure

Correct your spelling

culture

shock. I understand whether that

sitution

Correct your spelling

situation

will cause

your

Correct pronoun usage

you

show examples

tension, but at

first,

Linking Words

when you travel around, I do believe that

this

Linking Words

feeling will not

along with

Linking Words

them

Correct pronoun usage

you

show examples

Change preposition

for so

show examples

long. In fact, when the

tourits

Correct your spelling

tourists

saw the culture and

tradition

Use synonyms

on the smartphone screen and television that were

display

Wrong verb form

displayed

show examples

an amazing culture that maybe they

Wrong verb form

did

show examples

not even realize it

Change the verb form

show examples

exist

Wrong verb form

existed

show examples

. They so looking forward to

see

Change the verb form

seeing

show examples

spectacular

Add an article

the spectacular

a spectacular

show examples

thing

Fix the agreement mistake

things

show examples

before visiting and it might be the same as you imagine or it might not be but at least they understand what they going to see. To

be conclude

Change the verb form

conclude

show examples

, I think it nothing new

for

Change preposition

show examples

this

Linking Words

technology era, you can search for everything in order to get as

Remove the redundancy

apply

show examples

much as possible data about the

country

Use synonyms

you plan

for travelling

Change preposition

to travel

show examples

Change preposition

to.

show examples

Therefore

Linking Words

, it will not be a big surprise for

those traveller

Change the determiner

that traveller

those travellers

show examples

because you can receive a

second

Add a hyphen

second-hand

show examples

hand

Use synonyms

experience.

Besided

Correct your spelling

Besides

instead

Linking Words

of stress, they

shold

Correct your spelling

should

exited

Correct your spelling

excited

show examples

about the different cultures.

kanchanakularathna1991Wed Jul 19 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence and cohesion

Try to improve the clarity in your arguments by better organizing your paragraphs with distinct main ideas. Each paragraph should focus on a single concept related to the overall argument.

coherence and cohesion

Make sure to use clearer topic sentences at the start of each paragraph. This helps the reader immediately understand what each paragraph will discuss.

task achievement

Be careful with spelling and grammatical inaccuracies as they can sometimes obscure your meaning. For example, check words like 'quiet' (should be 'quite') and 'serius' (should be 'serious').

task achievement

Add more specific examples or case studies to support your claims. This would enhance the relevance and depth of your response and make your argument stronger.

coherence and cohesion

Your conclusion needs clearer summarization of your main points. It should succinctly restate your thesis and the significance of your argument regarding tourism and cultural understanding.

task achievement

You demonstrate a good attempt to discuss both sides of the argument regarding tourism and cultural exchange, which is commendable.

task achievement

It's clear that you have a genuine interest in the topic, which comes through in your writing. Your personal insights about cultural awareness are valuable.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
66
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

421 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
The Internet allows us to stay connected with each other no matter where we are. On the other hand, it also isolates us and encourages people not to socialise. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Today, many people believe that communication develops through social media. while others think that social media encourages people not to socialite. In my perspective, the Internet with different apps makes contact with each other easier.
6.5
band
In modern era, it is easy to sell, buy and work with other people through internet. But others against it. Do you think this is positive trend or negative trend.
There are two contrasting perspectives regarding internet usage in the working area. Some individuals advocate that the internet helps them in selling, buying, or working in this recent time, while others assert the opposite. Despite the negative impact it may cause, in my opinion, however, this situation leads to positive development.
6.5
band
(VMN)Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease, government should focus on reducing environment pollution and housing problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is argued that preventing disease and illness requires a solution for declining environmental pollution and housing issues from the government. The writer contends that the urgent call of the government's is essential to alert the citizens and, together, solve existing problems such as polluted water or housing pressure.
7.5
band
Some people say history is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think in today’s world, subjects like science and technology are more important than history. Discuss both views and give opinions.
Many believe that studying about events of the past is a vital lesson area. Whilst some believe modern creative subjects like, science and technology are more necessary to develop today's world. I agree with the latter view because these subjects are problem-solving and improve humanity.
6
band
As transport and accommodation problems are increasing in many cities, some Governments are encouraging businesses to move the rural area. Do you think the advantages outweigh to disadvantages?
Owing to the paucity of shelter and traffic congestion, businesses centered in cities are advised to relocate to the countryside by the government. The merits of this recommendation are more for city-dwellers and a company as compared to demerits.

Nowadays, international tourism is the biggest industry in the world. Unfortunately, it creates tension rather than understanding between people from different cultures. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Fully explain your ideas

The Internet allows us to stay connected with each other no matter where we are. On the other hand, it also isolates us and encourages people not to socialise. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In modern era, it is easy to sell, buy and work with other people through internet. But others against it. Do you think this is positive trend or negative trend.

(VMN)Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease, government should focus on reducing environment pollution and housing problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say history is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think in today’s world, subjects like science and technology are more important than history. Discuss both views and give opinions.

As transport and accommodation problems are increasing in many cities, some Governments are encouraging businesses to move the rural area. Do you think the advantages outweigh to disadvantages?