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Writing Samples
Band 8.5

The chart below shows the number of households in the US by their annual income in 2007, 2011 and 2015. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the number of households in the US by their annual income in 2007, 2011 and 2015. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The graph illustrates the number of families in the United States based on the amount of their wages in three different years: 2007,2011, and 2015. The Salary ranges from less than 25,000
dollars
Use synonyms
 to over 100,000
dollars
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, it shows that most people earn money at the highest level during the mentioned times.
According to
Linking Words
 the chart, the amount of their income was raised regularly. It is observed that 25 million citizens made money less than 25,000
dollars
Use synonyms
 in 2007.
While
Linking Words
 up to 30 million households had considerable wages, which roughly estimated around 100,000
dollars
Use synonyms
 or more. Four years later, individuals tried their best to earn more money, but the average income went down to about 49.000 to 50.000
dollars
Use synonyms
.
In contrast
Linking Words
, in 2015,
due to
Linking Words
 crises and financial problems, people were forced to work overtime.
As a result
Linking Words
, 35 million employees got 100,000
dollars
Use synonyms
 or more.
This
Linking Words
 diversity was imperative during the eight years,
according to
Linking Words
 the information.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "according to".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words dollars with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • annual income
  • distribution
  • households
  • trend
  • significant changes
  • economic conditions
  • policy changes
  • social factors
  • income categories
  • lowest categories
  • highest categories
  • observed data
  • comparison
  • years under review
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