IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table shows the proportion of puplis attending four secondary school types between 2000 and 2009 Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

The table shows the proportion of puplis attending four secondary school types between 2000 and 2009 Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant
#proportion #puplis #four #school #information #features #comparisons
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The table illustrates the four secondary
schools
Use synonyms
 in which students attend in proportion between 2000 and 2009.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that the Voluntary-controlled
schools
Use synonyms
 were at
peak
Correct pronoun usage
their peak
show examples
 at the beginning of the period.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
Grammar
Correct article usage
the Grammar
show examples
 academy
also
Linking Words
 had 24 per cent of pupils in the beginning. In the
end
Use synonyms
, Community
schools
Use synonyms
 had a higher proportion of candidates.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, Specialist
schools
Use synonyms
 had a fall trend during the period.
However
Linking Words
, it had 12% of candidates
at the
Linking Words
end
Use synonyms
 it had only 10 rate of pupils. Next , Grammar school
also
Linking Words
 had a fall variation during the beginning it had 24 rates of students and the ratio of them started to fall off
at the
Linking Words
end
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the Vocabulary school had the highest ratio of pupils in 2000 ,
as well as
Linking Words
, it have a fluctuating trend in the middle of the year.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, in the
Use synonyms
end
Add a comma
,end
show examples
 it had a proportion of 20% of them in secondary
schools
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
, Community had an increased variation in the period. In the year ,2000 it had only 12% of the ratio ,
as well as
Linking Words
, it dramatically rise and had 58% of them.
Submitted by fazilharis20 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, as well as, at the end".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words schools, end with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "proportion" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "ratio" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "fall" was used 3 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: