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Writing Samples
Band 3.5

This chart below shows the percentage of households in owned and rented accommodation in England and Walse between 1918 and 2011

This chart below shows the percentage of households in owned and rented accommodation in England and Walse between 1918 and 2011
#percentage #households #accommodation #england #walse
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The chart
illustrstes hnformation abour
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illustrates information about
the
Correct article usage
apply
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owned and rented households in
tow
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two
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 countries ,England and
Walse
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Wales
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 from the period 1918 to 20011. from an
overall
Linking Words
'
prespective
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perspective
 it is evident that was
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a disparty
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disparty
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disparity
 between the
proprotion
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proportion
 of owned households and the rented
one
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ones
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,
Linking Words
However
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,However
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 they have the same strong of growing but in different periods.
According to
Linking Words
 the chart below we can see clearly that rented
houses
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was
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were
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 increased
gardally
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gradually
 over 70%in 1918,
while
Linking Words
 the
owned
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number of owned
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houses
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was
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were
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in
Change preposition
at
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low
Add an article
the low
a low
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 rate it was over 20%,
Although
Linking Words
 we can observed owned
houses
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pack
Wrong verb form
packed
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 up
in
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at
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high
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a high
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 level between 1991-2000
Whereas
Linking Words
, slightly decline at more 60% but it has sharply
drouped
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dropped
at
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to
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 30% ,So the owned
houses
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a
Correct article usage
apply
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stood in the good
figuer
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figure
figures
at the end
Linking Words
 of the time which
aollw
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allow
 people to live in
owmned
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owned
houses
Use synonyms
 .
Submitted by Ssaraan2017 on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words houses with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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